Registered: Oct 2001
Location: Lat: 43° 42' 0 N, Long: 79° 34' 0 W
Posts: 2820

I've noticed a lot of people like the Simpsons (duh), so I think you should take this oppertunity to post your favorite Simpsons quotes.... or paraphrase them to your best ability. We will try to refrain from correcting you.

Lisa: We're the MTV generation. We feel no highs, no lows...
Homer: What's that like?
Lisa: Meh.

Homer: nobody gets into heaven without a glostick.

Homer: Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.

Homer: No TV and no beer make Homer something something.
Marge: Go crazy?
Homer: Don't mind if I do...ooo....ooooo

Abe: They say the greatest tragedy is when a father outlives his son. I never understood why.

Dr. Nick: Well if it isn't my friend Mr. McCraig with a leg for an arm and an arm for a leg!

Maggie: Daddy.

Okay... I feel like a mental brain midget. This'll do, and your adding more will help a lot

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: LfuckinA
Posts: 3377

Homer to Bart: YOU CHOKE ON YOUR LIES!

and of course, the new word in the dictionary: D'OH!


edit: there was also that little brazillian boy that Lisa adopted who was on that video sent to them that said (when speaking of monkeys eating his blood): I am like sugar to them.

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Registered: Sep 2000
Location: Playa d'en London
Posts: 9832

copy and pasted from this thread




homer: "...this gun had a hold on me. i felt this incredible surge of power, like God must feel when he's holding a gun."


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Monty Burns to a vending machine ' Ah a candy shop , I'll have two pounds of Bristol's toffee and dont wrap it too tightly , I'm hungry now !! '


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Ralph:"Me fail english? That´s unpossible."


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homer: "wait a minute! is this the biggest steak you've got? seventy-two ounces? i thought this was supposed to be a steak house, not a little girl underpantsy, pink doily tea party place."



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homer's brain: "don't say you're going outside to stalk karl and lenny, don't say you're going outside to stalk karl and lenny, don't say you're going outside to stalk karl and lenny."

homer: "i'm... going outside... to... stalk... karl and... lenny. doh!"



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Principal Skinner, when his mother tells him the line they're waiting in isn't moving fast enough:

"I'm not principal of the line, mother."



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Monty Burns to attendant as he pulls into a petrol station:
'Fill me up with petroleum distillate and revulcanise those tyres post haste'


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Ralph Wiggum: "My cat's breath smells like cat food."



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homer: hello my name is mr burns i believe u have a package for me

post office guy: ok whats your first name

homer: I dont know d'oh (and then runs away)


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Moe attached to lie detector (at the end of the funniest scene ever!!!!) "I don't deserve shabby treatment like this!" "BEEEEEP!!"



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Mr. Burns -- "Smithers, turn here!"
Smithers -- "Ah Sir....you're driving...."
Mr. Burns -- "Exxxcellent"



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Homer: All right, brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer


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Lisa: "Well what DID we learn from all this?"
Homer: "Don't trust anyone"
Lisa: "Even you?"
Homer: "Especially me."


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lionel hutz: 'i move for a bad court thingy'
judge: 'a mistrial?'
lionel hutz: 'yeah. thats why youre the judge and im the law talking guy'
judge: 'lawyer?'
lionel hutz: 'right'


i miss phil hartman

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Mulder: Look at this, Scully: there has been another unsubstantiated UFO sighting in the heartland of America. We've got to get there right away.
Scully: Well, gee Mulder, there's also this report of a shipment of drugs and illegal weapons coming into New Jersey tonight.
Mulder: I hardly think the FBI is concerned with matters like that.



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Skinner: Children, I couldn't help monitoring your conversation. There's no mystery about Willy. Why, he simply disappeared. Now, let's have no more curiosity about this bizarre cover-up.


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Barney: Hello, my name is Barney and I'm an alcoholic.
Lisa: Mr. Gumble, this is a Girl Scout meeting!
Barney: Is it? Or is it that you girls can't admit you have a problem?


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Reverend Lovejoy: This so-called "new religion" is nothing but a pack of weird rituals and chants, designed to take away the money of fools. Let us say the Lord's Prayer 40 times, but first, let's pass the collection plate!


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Cheif Wiggum: "Ah, they all come out at night. Or in this case, during the day..."



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Cheif Wiggum: " I'm proceeding on foot!"
Lou: "Requesting backup.......we need pretzels repeat pretzels!"



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Homer (to himself): don't say you were at Moe's, don't say you were at Moe's, don't say you were at Moe's
Homer (out loud now): I was at a pornography store, I was buying pornography.

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Homer "now we all learned a great lesson today ..Watching stuff is better than doing stuff"


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Troy McClure: "Hi, I'm Troy McClure, and you might remember me from such instruction videos as Mothballing Your Battleship and Dig Your Own Grave and Save


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Comic Book Guy - "Inspired by the most logical race in the galaxy, the Vulcans, breeding will be permitted once every seven years. For many of you, this will be much less breeding. For me, much, much more."


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Homer (wasted beyond belief) to the social worker: 'Hey! It's not my fault. The liquor drunkened me!


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Hutz:"Hutz is the name Mr. Simpson. Lionel Hutz, attorney-at-law. Here's my card. It turns into a sponge when wet.
Homer: Ooh, classy."

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Homer: It's funny, because it's happening to somebody else!
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Chief Wiggum (on an episode of "Bad Cops"): Uh... the suspect was six feet tall, and he, uh... was not wearing a hat.

Homer (watching tv): I hope they catch his hat-less butt!

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Willy: Grease me up, Lunch Lady Doris, I'm going in!

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 15133

Bart: "Don't you mean the shining?"
Willy: "Shh! Ye wanna get sued?!"

Or something like that.

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Registered: Oct 2001
Location: toronto
Posts: 1612

"Ooh! Barbecue!" -- Homer, on his first sight of hell.

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Registered: Dec 2000
Location: where the buses don't run
Posts: 1002

"Fat Tony is a cancer on this fair city! He is the cancer, and I am the...uh...what cures cancer?"
------------------------------------
"And how many times will we have to go to church to avoid going to hell?"

"Every Sunday for the rest of our lives."

"Hahahahaha...no, really?"
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"And how's my little Major Leaguer? Catch any june bugs today?"

"Well, me and Milhouse took some mail from the mail truck and threw it down the sewer."

"Son, I know you meant well, but that wasn't the right thing to do."

"What the hell are you talking about? You're the one who double-dared us."
------------------------------
"I've reviewed your 10 year evaluation, and it's appalling! In 10 years, you've caused 17 meltdowns! One is too many!"

"Yeah, but-"

"And you sold weapon-grade plutonium to the Iraqis...with no markup!"

"But-"

"And you took the Hamburglar's birthday off last Monday and Wednesday! Which is it?!"
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"All right, Homer. We want you to recreate your every move the night you saw this alien."

"Well, the evening began at the Gentlemen's Club, where we were discussing Wittgenstein over a game of backgammon."

"Mr. Simpson, it's a felony to lie to the FBI."

"We were sitting in Barney's car eating packets of mustard. Ya happy?"
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"The English side was ruined, so I had to use the French instructions. Le grille??? What the hell is 'le grille'?!" - Homer trying to put together a grill
------------------------------

Those are just some of my away messages on IM.

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Registered: Sep 2000
Location: Playa d'en London
Posts: 9832

"Last night's 'Itchy & Scratchy' was, without a doubt, the worst
episode ever. Rest assured that I was on the Internet within minutes, registering my disgust throughout the world." ~ comic book guy

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Registered: Jan 2002
Location: UK
Posts: 13002

Constable Wiggum on Lottery Night.

'errr no.... this is 91......2'

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