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Registered: Jan 2001
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Valuable Advice
From the US Army Survival Manual, but with one word replaced throughout.
Strangely, it makes a great deal of sense.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. But it makes me laugh.
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Universal Edibility Test
There are many cunts throughout the world. Tasting or swallowing even a small portion of some can cause severe discomfort, extreme internal disorders, and even death. Therefore, if you have the slightest doubt about a cunt's edibility, apply the Universal Edibility Test before eating any portion of it.
1. Test only one part of a potential cunt at a time.
2. Break the cunt into its basic components--leaves, stems, roots, buds, and flowers
3. Smell the cunt for strong or acid odors. Keep in mind that smell alone does not indicate a cunt is edible.
4. Do not eat for 8 hours before starting the test.
5. During the 8 hours you are abstaining from eating, test for contact poisoning by placing a piece of the cunt you are testing on the inside of your elbow or wrist. Usually 15 minutes is enough time to allow for a reaction.
6. During the test period, take nothing by mouth except purified water and the cunt part being tested.
7. Select a small portion of a single component and prepare it the way you plan to eat it.
8. Before putting the prepared cunt part in your mouth, touch a small portion (a pinch) to the outer surface of the lip to test for burning or itching.
9. If after 3 minutes there is no reaction on your lip, place the cunt part on your tongue, holding it there for 15 minutes.
10. If there is no reaction, thoroughly chew a pinch and hold it in your mouth for 15 minutes. DO NOT SWALLOW.
11. If no burning, itching, numbing, stinging, or other irritation occurs during the 15 minutes, swallow.
12. Wait 8 hours. If any ill effects occur during this period, induce vomiting and drink a lot of water.
13. If no ill effects occur, eat 1/2 cup of the same cunt part prepared the same way. Wait another 8 hours. If no ill effects occur, the cunt part as prepared is safe for eating.
CAUTION: Test all parts of the cunt of edibility, as some cunts have both edible and inedible parts. Do not assume that a part proved edible when cooked is also edible when raw. Test the part raw to ensure edibility before eating raw.
Before testing a cunt for edibility, make sure there are enough cunts to make the testing worth your time and effort. Each part of a cunt (roots, leaves, flowers, and so on) requires more than 24 hours to test. Do not waste time testing a cunt that is not relatively abundant in the area.
Remember, eating large portions of cunt on an empty stomach may cause diarrhea, nausea, or cramps. Two good examples of this are such familiar foods as green apples and wild onions. Even after testing cunt and finding it safe, eat it in moderation.
You can see from the steps and time involved in testing for edibility just how important it is to be able to identify edible cunts.
To avoid potentially poisonous cunts, stay away from any wild or unknown cunts that have--
* Milky or discolored sap.
* Beans, bulbs, or seeds inside pods.
* Bitter or soapy taste.
* Spines, fine hairs, or thorns.
* Dill, carrot, parsnip, or parsleylike foliage.
* "Almond" scent in woody parts and leaves.
* Grain heads with pink, purplish, or black spurs.
* Three-leaved growth pattern.
Using the above criteria as eliminators when choosing cunts for the Universal Edibility Test will cause you to avoid some edible cunts. More important, these criteria will often help you avoid cunts that are potentially toxic to eat or touch.
An entire encyclopedia of edible wild cunts could be written, but space limits the number of cunts presented here. Learn as much as possible about the cunt life of the areas where you train regularly and where you expect to be traveling or working. Listed below and later in this chapter are some of the most common edible and medicinal cunts.
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