Registered: Aug 2000
Location:
Posts: 3030

Attempts to keep the long-dead pope animated are quickly failing. The cardinals have resorted to manual manipulation of his jaw.

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Registered: Sep 2001
Location: ........
Posts: 15059

Personally I find it bizarre, absurd even, that the leader of what is probably the most influencial religion of the world is placed in that position (leadership) when he is not good for much more than, well, dying.

Not that I want him to die or anything, I just don't think he is good for much else.

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Registered: Aug 2001
Location: Hilbert Space
Posts: 35779

quote:

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Originally posted by nymbus

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Registered: Mar 2003
Location: Canada
Posts: 99

Hmmm... I think I just soiled myself.

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Registered: Aug 2001
Location: is futile
Posts: 5078

those preteens sure look tasty, If I pray for a miracle, I might achieve an erection.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: NH
Posts: 6086

quote:

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Originally posted by Smug Git
Veeeery interesting, Mr Bond.

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Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Boston
Posts: 7271

"This is my best Planet of the Apes face. Now is Tim Burton making a sequel with me in it or not?!?"

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Registered: Jan 2001
Location: Van Diemen's Land.
Posts: 3607

"You know when I was younger I used to be a nationally rated rollerskater..."

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Registered: Aug 2002
Location: way out west
Posts: 138

His eyes, how they twinkled!
His dimples, how merry!

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Registered: Sep 2001
Location: ........
Posts: 15059

"I'd hit it" - Mugtoe

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Registered: Apr 2002
Location:
Posts: 270

Im glad my hands are still soiled from that young boys cum.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beatrice, Nebraska
Posts: 18877

Can I get some fucking Krazy Glue around here? My fucking jaw just fell the fuck on off. And someone pass me that blunt!

__________________

[Ignore Sig]

The pinnacle of Failbot technology.

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Registered: May 2002
Location:
Posts: 9051

"I hope you left enough room for my faith, BECAUSE I'M GOING TO RAM IT INTO YOUR STOMACH!"

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Registered: Jan 2001
Location: Zion
Posts: 4546

The other players at the World Series of Poker seemed suspicious of the Pope's "luck" as he sat stone faced with an ace / queen and waited for the flop.

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Dumbfucksville!
Posts: 12164

"Ubi est mea anaticula cumminosa?"

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Registered: Jan 2002
Location: US
Posts: 3552

quote:

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Originally posted by A.D.H.D
"You know when I was younger I used to be a nationally rated rollerskater..."

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Registered: Jan 2002
Location: US
Posts: 3552

"unfortunately, the 'scrolls' uncovered recently by Catholic anthropologists, believed to be the true conclusionary chapter to the Bible, actually turned out to be the undiscovered, yet rumored, Tolkien passages belonging to the Lord of the Rings series, proving Gandaulf was originally portrayed by Pope John Paul, until Tolkien decided to rewrite the books do to Pope John Paul's age, for apparently being to old to successfully represent the part of Gandaulf, and because Tolkien feared his readers might assume Pope John Paul had something on the side with Frodo and all the wee Hobbit boys."



yeah, I don't know where I was going with that :/

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Registered: Apr 2001
Location:
Posts: 16790

Pope Loses His Head


VATICAN CITY, March 29 -- The head of Pope John Paul II fell right off his shoulders during a speech today. A shocked crowd stared on as people scrambled around the stage trying to retrieve the head of the Pope. After someone finally got a hold of it, they weren’t quite sure what to do next. Finally an unsure Bishop placed the head back on the pope’s shoulders and held it in place while another Bishop spoke into the microphone saying, "There is nothing to see here folks, move along...move along" We have been told the pope is recovering and in a statement thanked both god and the miracle of duct tape for his recovery.
No one is quite sure what happens next, as far as the Pope’s duties and his abilities to perform them go but an unnamed source tells Reuters, “This is a public relations nightmare. While no one has any illusions about how old the pope is no one was really expecting his head to just fall off.”

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Registered: Jul 2001
Location: China
Posts: 11795

quote:

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Originally posted by GoFuckYourselves!
"Ubi est mea anaticula cumminosa?"

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: Boston, MA, Center of the Universe
Posts: 4538

Heah we see Pongo, the oldest documented living male orangutan. Too old to fling 'is shit anymore, he just sits motionless, surveying 'is territ'ry. Crikey, he's an old buggah.

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: GA
Posts: 6969

"Well Holy Shit Fire!....Wonderaz and Jeb comming to confession..."

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Registered: Apr 2001
Location: 0.50
Posts: 9355

quote:

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Originally posted by Lu
hey now!

the pope appears to be a lot older than 40, sir

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Registered: Apr 2002
Location: At Home
Posts: 4234

Is this the "self-mastication" everyone keeps talking about?

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Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Baba Kueria
Posts: 3146

I put the Ape in Papal, baby.

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