Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beyond Mason-Dixon Line
Posts: 16165

I walked in th'jackass's room t'day while he wuz still in jail, lookin' fer m'last bottle o' Dickel. There wuz a fella hunkered over his chest with his back t'me 'n' it appeared he wuz tryin' on one o' his red brassieres. I stuck the tip o' m'walkin' cane in his back 'n' ordered him t'state his name 'n' business. He threw his hands up in the air 'n' hollered, "I Chee Wup Sun! I rookin' fo' Paint Chicks!"

I wacked 'im a couple times with m'cane 'n' Fred tore the ass-end outta his britches 'fore he got away.

Just thought y'all oughtta know.

Amen.

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Registered: Feb 2003
Location: Oceanside, CA
Posts: 5073

I'll keep m'eye out fer 'im in Californiyay, JEB.

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Registered: May 2002
Location: No. California
Posts: 4175

Y'don' reckon it were one o' them thar "queer eye" fellers lookin' t' swap out yer ol' drawers for them thar Joe Boxer thangs, d'ye?

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Sedona, Arizona
Posts: 18823

I'm missing my urine sample.

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: All East Coast : USA
Posts: 2450

CHEE WUP SON FOREVER

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beyond Mason-Dixon Line
Posts: 16165

quote:

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Originally posted by Peter_Torque
Y'don' reckon it were one o' them thar "queer eye" fellers lookin' t' swap out yer ol' drawers for them thar Joe Boxer thangs, d'ye?

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beyond Mason-Dixon Line
Posts: 16165

quote:

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Originally posted by wonderaz
I'm missing my urine sample.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26383

"No" may mean "no", but when it's spoken in a language I don't understand, it could just as easily mean "PUMP ME HARDER, O MAN-GOD!"

That's what I keep telling the police, anyway.

Any chance you got hold of Chee and locked him up for me so I can swing by and pick him up? That little bastard's a wiley one.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beyond Mason-Dixon Line
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quote:

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Originally posted by Paint CHiPs
. . . Any chance you got hold of Chee and locked him up for me so I can swing by and pick him up? That little bastard's a wiley one.

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Registered: May 2002
Location: No. California
Posts: 4175

quote:

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Originally posted by J E B Stuart
You outta yer mind? He's got sumpin' contagious. ... he wuz wearin' a Ricky Martin t-shirt

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Well, there y'go. Ricky Martin t-shirts is contajusly gay. Thet's just lak when yer sister had them dam cold sores an' you were complainin' about yer dickel itchin'. It don't take no mathamach mathemachet machemathema... dammit... cypherin' jeenyus to put too an too t'gether.

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Registered: Jan 2001
Location: Zion
Posts: 4444

I think it's time we form a neighborhood watch. I'm tired of peeking in windows all by myself.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Oregon. America.
Posts: 2076

My girlfriend and I broke up about two months ago and I want to swallow knives to make the pain in my stomach go away.

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Registered: Aug 2001
Location: Hilbert Space
Posts: 35561

Swallowing knives won't make the pain go away. They are sharp so it'll hurt. You'll be wheeled into hospital thinking 'Jesus, added to the pain of the breakup these knives in my throat are just too fucking much'.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: zanzibar
Posts: 10413

If you are gonna swallow knives, it might be cool if you did it in a plexiglas box in London. I think they are big on stunts there.

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Registered: Aug 2001
Location: Hilbert Space
Posts: 35561

You'll get provided with free eggs, too. You'll just have to catch them.

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Registered: Feb 2003
Location: Oceanside, CA
Posts: 5073

quote:

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Originally posted by Feral Automaton
My girlfriend and I broke up about two months ago and I want to swallow knives to make the pain in my stomach go away.

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Registered: Aug 2001
Location: Hilbert Space
Posts: 35561

He might be short of knives.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: London
Posts: 3008

quote:

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Originally posted by wonderaz
I'm missing my urine sample.

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Registered: May 2002
Location: No. California
Posts: 4175

As a 'Merican who hangs with Brit types, I think you should know that very few of my countrymen know what "taking the piss" is. No doubt we'll hear from a few immediately after this post who do indeed know what it means, and good on them (golfclap). But I'd venture to guess that 99% of the rest of humanity would have no clue as to what you are trying to convey.

Since we're on the subject, though; can't you assholes find a better phrase for "I am joking with you" than "I'm taking the piss?"

Granted, we have "pulling your leg, joshing, bustin' your balls, etc." but "taking the piss" doesn't even make sense grammatically. Who was the first one to use the phrase, and why? Was there someone talking to someone else sometime back in WWI and they saw a Jerry carting off some urine samples? Did they stop him with a cry of "yoo hoo!" and bayonet him, only to find from his last words that he was only there to steal superior British urine, having found German urine inferior both in taste and consistency?

What does it have to do with Ricky Martin T-shirts on gay Asian burglars?

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Registered: Jun 2002
Location: Just to the right of the moon
Posts: 3141

Nothing literal about this one, you will be pleased to hear. It’s usually said that the phrase derives from an older one, piss-proud, which refers to having an erection when waking up in the morning, which is usually attributed to a full bladder (proud here being an obvious pun on its senses of something raised or projecting and of something in which one may take satisfaction).
It’s first recorded, as so many such indecorous expressions are, in Francis Grose’s A Classical Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue; in the second edition of 1788 he wrote: “Piss-proud, having a false erection. That old fellow thought he had an erection, but his — was only piss-proud; said of any old fellow who marries a young wife”.
This developed into a figurative sense of somebody who had an exaggerated idea of his own importance. So to take the piss is to deflate somebody, to disabuse them of their mistaken belief that they are special. It’s not recorded before the beginning of the twentieth century.



Taken from Google, btw

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: London
Posts: 3008

quote:

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Originally posted by Peter_Torque
As a 'Merican who hangs with Brit types, I think you should know that very few of my countrymen know what "taking the piss" is. No doubt we'll hear from a few immediately after this post who do indeed know what it means, and good on them (golfclap). But I'd venture to guess that 99% of the rest of humanity would have no clue as to what you are trying to convey.

Since we're on the subject, though; can't you assholes find a better phrase for "I am joking with you" than "I'm taking the piss?"

Granted, we have "pulling your leg, joshing, bustin' your balls, etc." but "taking the piss" doesn't even make sense grammatically. Who was the first one to use the phrase, and why? Was there someone talking to someone else sometime back in WWI and they saw a Jerry carting off some urine samples? Did they stop him with a cry of "yoo hoo!" and bayonet him, only to find from his last words that he was only there to steal superior British urine, having found German urine inferior both in taste and consistency?

What does it have to do with Ricky Martin T-shirts on gay Asian burglars?

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beyond Mason-Dixon Line
Posts: 16165

Yeah, well . . . ummm . . . all I know is th'jackass really likes t'pee in jars, i.e., he gits off on it. Is there a term fer one who gits his kicks peein' in jars?

Oh, 'n' I've been tryin' t'track down some info on this Chee Wup Sun fella. I ain't been able t'pin it down yet, but my gut tells me he's another damn deviant. Hell, fer all I know, he may even be, among other thangs, another one o' them pee-jar freaks like that jackass.

And th'strangest thang, too. When I gave 'im th'business end o' m'cane, he dropped a matchbook with spheenxy's address scribbled on it. Sumpin' sinister afoot, here.

Amen.

p.s. Feral, gitcher ass down here 'n' stay with me 'n' th'jackass fer a few days. Th'experience should giveya a whole new slant on life.

p.p.s. Y'might oughtta bring sum wampum withya, too, bein' as th'jackass's bail yesterday mornin' put me under a bit o' financial stress until th'first o' th'month.

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Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Disgusting den of creepitude
Posts: 9694

quote:

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Originally posted by J E B Stuart
Yeah, well . . . ummm . . . all I know is th'jackass really likes t'pee in jars, i.e., he gits off on it. Is there a term fer one who gits his kicks peein' in jars?

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