Registered: Nov 2003
Location: armpit, wv
Posts: 1217

Since yesterday was Tax Day, my job at the firm I was working part time basicly ended. Well, I thought I would be on leave for a month and come back in May. That all changed when I got a call yesterday to come in for an interview which at the time, all I knew was for a payroll position. When I entered the facilities, it turned out I was being interviewed for a business that provides bookkeeping and accounting services strictly for churches, non-profit religious groups, christian schools and ministers across the country. I felt like I had just stepped onto the streets of 1938 Poland. The place had a creepy creepy vibe. Maybe it was the wholesome goodness that was oozing from wall-to-wall. Or it could've been that they were running all Mac's which for some reason I didn't find so shocking.

Anyways, met the owner, blah blah blah.....Nice guy and good sense of humor. They asked if I wanted to come back today and do some tests (mock payroll stuff) and I agreed. I figured what the hell. At least if I did well I could always ask to use him for a reference. Well, for one sense non of these groups are tax exempted, the stuff is WAY easier than what I was use to. I just got off the phone w/ the office manager who offered me a position and before I could say I would reconsider the guy actually offered me a nice bump in pay. So.......

As of Monday I will be part of the evil republican/white christian empire doing my part to make sure they can keep as money coin in their pocket as I can. The irony of this scenario, I have a COOP demon nun tattooed on one arm and a burning church on the other. So for now on, it's long sleeves, act like my daughter's in the room so I don't scream out "motherfucker" when I screw up, and try the damnest they don't see the big sticker fish on the back of my car w/ the "satan" in the middle.

And yes I do take out all the piercings. I've had em for so long, I can leave em out for days and not heal up.

But on the positive this will make for an interesting company picnic!

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Registered: Apr 2004
Location: Cwesting
Posts: 9241

Subvert from within. It's the most effective.

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Registered: Mar 2004
Location: Underneath GFY.....
Posts: 397

They could end up being a bunch of wild party animals for all you know. Try to get them to update their computer system while you are there.

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Registered: Feb 2004
Location: in colorado somewhere!
Posts: 28365

I don't think they really care much.A month into your job,you should come in with short sleeves and your body piercings and watch the scandal develop.
I bet by then you would have proven yourself more than capable and they won't fire you.But do it once so everyone see's.
It sure beats getting invited to their church and getting born again.

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Santa is coming. That gives me joy. It gives me even greater joy that Hawley will get a coal this year.

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Registered: Feb 2004
Location:
Posts: 22

That sounds like a hell.

Take notes.

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Registered: Nov 2003
Location: armpit, wv
Posts: 1217

It's gonna be interesting since I really don't know much about what all's tax exempt and what some of these groups attempt to right off.

At least come Halloween all I'll need to do is to just come in how I dress outside the office.

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Registered: Dec 2002
Location: Minneapolis MN
Posts: 365

And hey, it would be ironic for a satanist to sue a church based bsuiness for religious discrimination, the movie rights alone from the story would be worth millions,.

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Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Boston
Posts: 7940

I wish you good luck in this new endeavor. Make sure to try corrupting some of your coworkers slowly but surely.

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Registered: Feb 2004
Location: NYC
Posts: 17709

seems like a good oppertunity to buy a huge butt-plug and use it as a paper weight in the office

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Registered: May 2002
Location: No. California
Posts: 4175

That's probably going to be one of the wildest places you've ever worked. It's all about keeping up appearances (after all, you're talking major tax-free cash from different churches all over the place, you can't expect the office to look like a brothel). I saw a great 60 Minutes piece once where a reporter with a hidden camera went into a Christian marketing/accounting firm to check out the biz.

Unbelievable. They have every type of mass-mailing scheme going, from hundreds of video titles and "free" gifts like little cheap Taiwanese crosses they sell for $100 "donations" to Robert Tilton-esque "prayer swatches," (little pieces of cloth supposedly blessed by Bob). The guy who ran the biz told the reporter "just one video will net you over a million dollars in six months, tax-free."

You'll see. Aside from a tattoo of a burning church (what were you thinking, btw?) they'll be all over you in no time. I'll bet you fifty bucks right now that you'll either fuck or do drugs with somebody there before anybody tries to convert you. I have faith in mammon.

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