Registered: Feb 2004
Location: kingdom of christ
Posts: 17817

this is a fascinating read, a bit disturbing but very interesting non the less:


Bill McHenry is a 26-year old white male with a stocky build and a beard. His head is shaved. He responded to my ad to be interviewed for this article wearing only leather pants, leather boots and a leather vest. I could see that both of his nipples were pierced with large-gauge silver rings.

Questioner: I hope you won't be offended if I ask you to prove to me that you're a nullo. Just so that our readers will know that this isn't a fake.

Bill: Sure, no problem. (stands and unbuckles pants and drops them to his ankles, revealing a smooth, shaven crotch with only a thin scar to show where his genitals once were).

Q: Thank you. That's a remarkable sight.

(laughs and pulls pants back up). Most people think so.

Q: What made you decide to become a nullo?

(pauses). Well, it really wasn't entirely my decision.

Q: Excuse me?

The idea wasn't mine. It was my lover's idea.

Q: Please explain what you mean.

Okay, it's a long story. You have to understand my relationship with Michael before you'll know what happened.

Q: We have plenty of time. Please go on.

Both of us were into the leather lifestyle when we met through a personal ad. Michael's ad was very specific: he was looking for someone to completely dominate and modify to his pleasure. In other word, a slave.

The ad intrigued me. I had been in a number of B&D scenes and also some S&M, but I found them unsatisfying because they were all temporary. After the fun was over, everybody went on with life as usual.

I was looking for a complete life change. I wanted to meet someone who would be part of my life forever. Someone who would control me and change me at his whim.

Q: In other words, you're a true masochist.

Oh yes, no doubt about that. I've always been totally passive in my sexual relationships.

Anyway, we met and there was instant chemistry. Michael is a few years older than me and very good looking. Our personalities meshed totally. He's very dominant.

I went back to his place after drinks and had the best sex of my life. That's when I knew I was going to be with Michael for a long, long time.

Q: What sort of things did you two do?

It was very heavy right away. He restrained me and whipped me for quite awhile. He put clamps on my nipples and a ball gag in my mouth. And he hung a ball bag on my sack with some very heavy weights. That bag really bounced around when Michael fucked me from behind.

Q: Ouch.

(laughs) Yeah, no kidding. At first I didn't think I could take the pain, but Michael worked me through it and after awhile I was flying. I was sorry when it was over.

Michael enjoyed it as much as I did. Afterwards he talked about what kind of a commitment I'd have to make if I wanted to stay with him.

Q: What did he say exactly?

Well, besides agreeing to be his slave in every way, I'd have to be ready to be modified. To have my body modified.

Q:Did he explain what he meant by that?

Not specifically, but I got the general idea. I guessed that something like castration might be part of it.

Q: How did that make you feel?

(laughs) I think it would make any guy a little hesitant.

Q:But it didn't stop you from agreeing to Michael's terms?

No it didn't. I was totally hooked on this man. I knew that I was willing to pay any price to be with him.

Anyway, a few days later I moved in with Michael. He gave me the rules right away: I'd have to be naked at all times while we were indoors, except for a leather dog collar that I could never take off. I had to keep my head shaved. And I had to wear a butt plug except when I needed to take a shit or when we were having sex.

I had to sleep on the floor next to his bed. I ate all my food on the floor, too.

The next day he took me to a piercing parlor where he had my nipples done, and a Prince Albert put into the head of my cock.

Q: Heavy stuff.

Yeah, and it got heavier. He used me as a toilet, pissing in my mouth. I had to lick his asshole clean after he took a shit, too. It was all part of a process to break down any sense of individuality I had. After awhile, I wouldn't hesitate to do anything he asked.

Q:Did the sex get rougher?

Oh God, yeah. He started fisting me every time we had sex. But he really started concentrating on my cock and balls, working them over for hours at a time.

He put pins into the head of my cock and into my sack. He attached clothespins up and down my cock and around my sack. The pain was pretty bad. He had to gag me to keep me from screaming.

Q: When did the idea of nullification come up?

Well, it wasn't nullification at first. He started talking about how I needed to make a greater commitment to him, to do something to show that I was dedicated to him for life.

When I asked him what he meant, he said that he wanted to take my balls.

Q: How did you respond?

Not very well at first. I told him that I liked being a man and didn't want to become a eunuch. But he kept at me, and wore me down. He reminded me that I agreed to be modified according to his wishes, and this is what he wanted for me. Anything less would show that I wasn't really committed to the relationship. And besides, I was a total bottom and didn't really need my balls.

It took about a week before I agreed to be castrated. But I wasn't happy about it, believe me.

Q: How did he castrate you?

Michael had a friend who was into the eunuch scene. One night he came over with his bag of toys, and Michael told me that this was it. I was gonna lose my nuts then and there.

Q:Did you think of resisting?

I did for a minute, but deep down I knew there was no way. I just didn't want to lose Michael. I'd rather lose my balls.

Michael's friend restrained me on the living room floor while Michael videotaped us. He used an elastrator to put a band around my sack.

Q: That must have really hurt.

Hell yeah. It's liked getting kicked in the balls over and over again. I screamed for him to cut the band off, but he just kept on going, putting more bands on me. I had four bands around my sack when he finished.

I was rolling around on the floor screaming, while Michael just videotaped me. Eventually, my sack got numb and the pain subsided. I looked between my legs and could see my sack was a dark purple. I knew my balls were dying inside.

Michael and his friend left the room and turned out the light. I lay there for hours, crying because I was turning into a eunuch and there wasn't anything I could do about it.

Q: What happened then?

Eventually I fell asleep from exhaustion. Then the light switched on and I could see Michael's friend kneeling between my legs, touching my sack. I heard him tell Michael that my balls were dead.

Q: How did Michael react?

Very pleased. He bent down and felt around my sack. He said that it felt cold.

Michael's friend told me that I needed to keep the bands on. He said that eventually my balls and sack would dry up and fall off. I just nodded. What else could I do at that point?

Q: Did it happen just like Michael's friend said?

Yeah, a week or so later my package just fell off. Michael put it in a jar of alcohol to preserve it. It's on the table next to his bed.

Q:How did things go after that?

Michael was really loving to me. He kept saying how proud he was of me, how grateful that I had made the commitment to him. He even let me sleep in his bed.

Q: What about the sex?

We waited awhile after my castration, and then took it easy until I was completely healed. At first I was able to get hard, but as the weeks went by my erections began to disappear.

That pleased Michael. He liked fucking me and feeling my limp cock. It made his dominance over me even greater.

Q: When did he start talking about making you a nullo?

A couple of months after he took my nuts. Our sex had gotten to be just as rough as before the castration. He really got off on torturing my cock. Then he started saying stuff like, "Why do you even need this anymore?"

That freaked me out. I always thought that he might someday take my balls, but I never imagined that he'd go all the way. I told him that I wanted to keep my dick.

Q: How did he react to that?

At first he didn't say much. But he kept pushing. Michael said I would look so nice being smooth between my legs. He said my dick was small and never got hard anymore, so what was the point of having it.

But I still resisted. I wanted to keep my cock. I felt like I wouldn't be a man anymore without it.

Q: So how did he get you to agree?

He didn't. He took it against my will.

Q: How did that happen?

We were having sex in the basement, and I was tied up and bent over this wooden bench as he fucked me. Then I heard the doorbell ring. Michael answered it, and he brought this guy into the room.

At first I couldn't see anything because of the way I was tied. But then I felt these hands lift me up and put me on my back. And I could see it was Michael's friend, the guy who took my nuts.

Q: How did you react?

I started screaming and crying, but the guy just gagged me. The two of them dragged me to the other side of the room where they tied me spread eagled on the floor.

Michael's friend snaked a catheter up my dick, and gave me a shot to numb my crotch. I was grateful for that, at least. I remember how bad it hurt to lose my balls.

Q: What was Michael doing at this time?

He was kneeling next to me talking quietly. He said I'd be happy that they were doing this. That it would make our relationship better. That kind of calmed me down. I thought, "Well, maybe it won't be so bad."

Q:How long did the penectomy take?

It took awhile. Some of the penis is inside the body, so he had to dig inside to get all of it. There was a lot of stitching up and stuff. He put my cock in the same jar with my balls. You can even see the Prince Albert sticking out of the head.

Then they made me a new pisshole. It's between my asshole and where my sack used to be. So now I have to squat to piss.

Q: What has life been like since you were nullified?

After I got over the surgery and my anger, things got better. When I healed up, I began to like my smooth look. Michael brought friends over and they all admired it, saying how pretty I looked. It made me feel good that Michael was proud of me.

Q: Do you have any sexual feeling anymore?

Yes, my prostate still responds when Michael fucks me or uses the buttplug. And my nipples are quite sensitive. If Michael plays with them while fucking me, I have a kind of orgasm. It's hard to describe, but it's definitely an orgasm.

Sometimes Michael says he's gonna have my prostate and nipples removed, but he's just kidding around. He's happy with what he's done to me.

Q: So are you glad Michael had you nullified?

Well, I wouldn't say I'm glad. If I could, I'd like to have my cock and balls back. But I know that I'm a nullo forever. So I'm making the best of it.

Michael and I are very happy. I know that he'll take care of me and we'll be together always. I guess losing my manhood was worth it to make that happen for us.

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Registered: Feb 2003
Location: Vista, CA
Posts: 5270

Holy God. That is seriously disturbing.
If a person voluntarily wanted to be castrated and have his genitals removed, I'd say he was misguided, but it's not really my business. But this guy was coerced into the castration, and then "nullified" against his will. The fact that he has come to terms with it is, in my mind, irrelevant--he is the victim of a sadistic torturer who should go to prison.

quote:

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Sometimes Michael says he's gonna have my prostate and nipples removed, but he's just kidding around. He's happy with what he's done to me.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beatrice, Nebraska
Posts: 19491

Just remember that he had to agree to have the operation performed. He's not exactly a victim.

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Registered: Feb 2003
Location: Vista, CA
Posts: 5270

It doesn't sound to me like he agreed to the penectomy. He states that it was removed against his will. The castration he agreed to, although it sounds to me like there was coercion involved, but I don't see how the rest can be regarded as anything but a criminal act.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beatrice, Nebraska
Posts: 19491

What kind of coercion? "Get your tackle cut off or I won't hang you buy your toes for a month?" Retards like him aren't victims of anything more than their own stupidity and sexual perversions. His partner couldn't just stroll up to the doc and say "While you're cutting off his berries you mind throwing in a penis removal as part of a comprehensive package, eh?" That's not the way it works. HE had to say "Off with it all" and therefore it's nobody's fault but his own.

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Registered: Feb 2003
Location: Vista, CA
Posts: 5270

quote:

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Q: How did you respond?

Not very well at first. I told him that I liked being a man and didn't want to become a eunuch. But he kept at me, and wore me down. He reminded me that I agreed to be modified according to his wishes, and this is what he wanted for me. Anything less would show that I wasn't really committed to the relationship. And besides, I was a total bottom and didn't really need my balls.

It took about a week before I agreed to be castrated. But I wasn't happy about it, believe me.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beatrice, Nebraska
Posts: 19491

I hardly see it as coercion at all. Coercion would be more like "Either you loose the cock and balls or I kill your family." Saying "Do it because you love me" hardly qualifies as coercion in my book. It's stupidity of the highest order and the guy is so fucking codependent he should be shot.

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Registered: Feb 2003
Location: Vista, CA
Posts: 5270

I agree on the codependency; it seems to have made him so vulnerable to this kind of pressure that he ends up in situations like this. Maybe coercion is not the right word.

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Registered: Apr 2004
Location: Cwesting
Posts: 9264

Delia Day was the online pseudonym of Susan, a photographer and artist, and the weblogger of "My illustrated life as a sex slave", which gave an intimate look into her full-time master/slave lifestyle — with her cast as the slave to a sadistic master. Her writing was well respected and contained many intelligent essays on the subject. She was bright and witty and likeable and we were happy to have her and her husband Travis, an equally likeable programmer for an image processing software company as BME/HARD contributors, and were looking forward to adding her to the BME/News staff.

Her and her husband appeared stable and suited together and, with children and an apparently "happy family" existence was seen by many as an ideal example of the S&M lifestyle as something normal and healthy (not that there weren't plenty of people who thought they were a bit nuts, but my own dealings with both of them were nothing but pleasant). They recently celebrated their 10th anniversary by tattooing a large slave-collar around her neck.

Then, in 2003, their seemingly happy life together took a dark turn. Foreshadowing an act that would have some argue that things may have been less consensual than what was being stated, she described her husband getting a used shotgun and teaching her how to use it (for "home defense"). Then, at 2 am in the morning of December 2, 2003, that shotgun took his life, and Susan called emergency services to report it. She was accused of having murdered him, and was taken into custody. Her websites were taken offline not long afterwards, as were his.

Ultimately, a grand jury failed to indict her due to their S&M lifestyle, calling the event self-defense. Susan has since moved to be near her family and try and find a new life, and would prefer it if people left her alone and allowed her to take back her privacy and anonymity.

Whether it really was self-defense, or whether Susan used the S&M lifestyle to cover up a murder is something the public will never really know for sure. However, because of the popularity of her website and her large following, the debate is sure to rage on in online forums for some time to come.
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I saw this woman's site before it was taken down. Her partner actually had her vagina sewn shut.
If I were Henry's top, I'd watch it.

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Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 26147

Natural selection is a beautiful thing.

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Registered: Sep 2000
Location: gawgia
Posts: 6669

quote:

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But I still resisted. I wanted to keep my cock. I felt like I wouldn't be a man anymore without it.

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: ObamaNation
Posts: 14541

quote:

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Originally posted by Trenchant_Troll
Natural selection is a beautiful thing.

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Registered: Feb 2004
Location: Centrally isolated
Posts: 280

I think Helen Keller probably said it best - Unghhhhhh

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Registered: May 2003
Location: The Cement Blight
Posts: 470

quote:

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Originally posted by Avondale
having his balls removed and being fucked up the ass and fisted by another man, being pissed on and licking shit off another man's ass do nothing to damage his sense of manliness?

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