Registered: Nov 2001
Location: Rio de los Brazos de Dios
Posts: 3876
Confrontation And Old Age
CONFRONTATION AND OLD AGE
Prior to my retirement twenty one years ago I was engaged in a position that was confrontational to a high degree. I was an officer of a company engaged in production of electronic systems for the US government and the communication agencies of other international governments. My job was involved with daily confrontation both in and out of the company to a high degree. I was a frequent negotiator with major suppliers and responsible for both reducing their costs and maintaining a high level of quality in their product. I also developed for the division of the company where I was employed the reputation of being able to explain away the errors that my own company made and present facts in such a way as to “make chicken shit look like chicken salad”. I enjoyed it. The daily stress was actually invigorating rather than depressing. I looked forward to each day’s contest with whatever customer or supplier was on tap with a great deal of relish. To me it was a game. Although my batting average was good I sometimes lost as one always does in human endeavor. I could shrug the losses off and not worry about them. They just sharpened my desire to win the next one.Many of these negotiations were in the multi-million dollar range.
It has come as quite a shock to me that I have changed in the last twenty-one years. I am no longer confrontational. I would no longer make a good negotiator..Last winter I bought two small electric space heaters like we old types like to put under our desk to keep our feet warm. When I got home with them one worked fine and the other wouldn’t even get warm I put the worthless one in a closet (with the sales receipt) and avoided taking it back for a refund ($24).
Right was all on my side. I had the receipt. The heater was obviously no good. I simply didn’t want to lug it back to the store and demand my money back. Frank ran across it and demanded we do so. The clerk smiled and handed me $24.
Where was the snarling-tiger ME that had crunched negotiators up for breakfast. I had become all sweetness and light and developed a milquetoast personality. There hasn’t just been one or two things like that but a whole lot. I avoid argument now when it used to be my very life’s blood. I have lost my yen for confrontation. My daughter who used to argue over the rules of the game of jacks is now a much more skillful and willing negotiator than I am. How time changes things.
When I was young I used to read about the decline of Western civilization, and I decided it was something I would like to make a contribution to. — George Carlin
Registered: Feb 2003
Location: Oceanside, CA
Posts: 5156
Good grief, I'm milquetoast NOW. To me, oxsan, you still seem willing to take on a challenge. If what you say is true, I'll be a nondescript lump of jello in thirty years.
But apparently not girls of dubious moral standards (abbreviated GoDMS...pronounced Go-Damns). While I respect your position, Oxsan, I believe personally I would prefer the GoDMS.
Registered: Nov 2001
Location: Rio de los Brazos de Dios
Posts: 3876
By assuming that I have no interest in the naked women of doubtful moral character you are leaping from an unwarranted assumption to a foregone conclusion based upon inconclusive data.
Registered: Sep 2000
Location: The Bottom of the Toyem Pole
Posts: 9455
Sounds to me like you just ended up maturing. I don't mean that it in a critical way (i.e., I'm not saying you were immature as a negotiator or whatever) but that avoiding confrontation while being at peace with it *can* be a sign of maturity and spiritual development. It also can be a sign of a big yellow streak down your belly. Both cases will be seen as indicative of a yellow streak by those who are insecure and view confrontation-avoidance as weakness.
Personally, I'm confrontational at times but very ineffective at it. I'm pretty easy going most times but when it comes time to shit or get off the pot, I fly like an arrow. This isn't very useful when negotiations require patience and dancing. I tend to blow my top and say and do things that don't help me to achieve my ends. I'm striving to develop a more effective middle ground.
It's the fact he doesn't have any interest in women of low moral character that scares the bejesus out of me.
I can deal with becoming a milktoast, but not with losing interest in sleazy women.
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07-05-2005 09:01 PM
