Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 16759

quote:

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Originally posted by Trenchant_Troll
Ergo my hiatus that begins now.

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Registered: Mar 2004
Location: Still Orygun
Posts: 10493

has he gone on vacation? I give him a week if so.

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: In a Blue, Blue State
Posts: 13486

A crackhead could stay away from the blow longer than T_T could stay away from here.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Sedona, Arizona
Posts: 19369

48 hours would be the "Fuck you I'm leaving this shithole forever" limit so I say... ummmm... 22 hours tops.

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Registered: Mar 2004
Location: Behind this monitor.
Posts: 6470

quote:

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Originally posted by ignatz mouse
has he gone on vacation? I give him a week if so.

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Registered: Mar 2004
Location: Behind this monitor.
Posts: 6470

Or he's busy with his book.

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Registered: Sep 2000
Location: atlanta
Posts: 6502

book? he can barely write single line responses

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Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 16759

It's a book of one-liners.

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Registered: Sep 2000
Location: atlanta
Posts: 6502

with plenty of typos, i assume

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Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 16759

buut off cuerse

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location:
Posts: 9434

He will never come back.

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Registered: May 2003
Location: N. Texas
Posts: 3553

Thank you Jesus!

That loudmouth motherfucker is gone for awhile. Probably gone off to some remote island clinic to get the rest of his asshole installed in that big fucking mouth of his.

God! I despise that motherfuckers jokes, and his semi-serious attempts to write heartfelt literature for the masses.

Good fucking riddance!

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Registered: May 2003
Location: N. Texas
Posts: 3553

Ding Dong the Troll is Dead
Which old bitch
That big Green Bitch.

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location:
Posts: 9434

Worst bait I ever saw.

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Registered: Feb 2004
Location: canada
Posts: 17277

quote:

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Originally posted by SimpleSimon
It's a book of one-liners.

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Registered: Nov 2003
Location: .
Posts: 8001

fags.

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Registered: May 2003
Location: N. Texas
Posts: 3553

Trollwatch 2005

Still no sign of the bastard!

Thank God for little miracles!

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Registered: Mar 2004
Location: Still Orygun
Posts: 10493

T_T, ^^ it's a cry for help ^^ a desperate plea for your return ^^ lanin aches for your humor and joie de vivre. how can you disappoint?

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Registered: May 2003
Location: N. Texas
Posts: 3553

quote:

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Originally posted by ignatz mouse
T_T, ^^ it's a cry for help ^^ a desperate plea for your return ^^ lanin aches for your humor and joie de vivre. how can you disappoint?

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Hi mouse ....I personally would'nt give it a second thought if the guy (troll) never posted again. a grown man with 10,000 posts on discussion board such as the asylum in around a year or little more does not make the guy man of the year in my book.

He's an easy target....hell he's always here posting.

He's clever and marginally funny......he's expertly crafted his "Wit" (perish the fucking thought) to appeal to the widest possible swath of banal humanity (cringe) that actually chuckle, chortle, and forward chain email type jokes.

Could he write a "My Town" or "As I see it" type book and get some due recognition.....most probably so.

He should spend his holiday reading Garrison Keillor and Lewis Grizzard. They are "True Humorists" not purveyors of bad one-liners.

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Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 16759

Especially Lewis Grizzard. Funniest american of his generation.

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Registered: Mar 2004
Location: Still Orygun
Posts: 10493

quote:

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Originally posted by lanin
Hi mouse ....

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unh-hunh. just don't expend too much energy not caring.

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: In a Blue, Blue State
Posts: 13486

quote:

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Originally posted by SimpleSimon
Especially Lewis Grizzard. Funniest american of his generation.

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Registered: May 2003
Location: N. Texas
Posts: 3553

Thank God we have some Lewis Grizzard fans here. What a great loss when that man passed away. I remember reading a story he wrote about when his dog "Catfish" died and it was one of the most wonderful and saddest things I've ever read, as I've got that very same relationship going on right now with my dog Annie. This is how he said it:

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It's been two months since my dog, Catfish, the black Lab, up and died on me.
He would have been 12 this month. I really thought I would be over it all by now. I get over divorces and surgeries in about six months. I figured I could get over the death of a dog in two.

But he lingers.

I've been asked a thousand times, "Are you going to get a new dog?"

I thought about it, and I've had a lot of offers. For all I hear about the failings of the human race, there are yet so many still out there that are willing to step forward in another's time of need. Even strangers.

I've had offers of bulldogs, beagle hounds, even a poodle, perish the thought, and, of course, other black Labs. I heard from a woman with a new litter of black Labs that had a paper trail on them dating back a century.

I'm sorry. I just didn't want a dog with a more impressive pedigree than my own.

And I worry about bringing up another dog during a puppy stage. I have a friend who was telling me, "My wife and I got a puppy once who chewed up our driveway."

I didn't believe that.

"I'm not lying," said my friend. "The dog chewed up the driveway. He found one loose piece of asphalt and started there. He pulled out that piece and chewed on it and then another piece and then another, until he had chewed-up asphalt chunks all over the yard and our driveway was dirt."

Catfish, when he was a puppy, destroyed television remote-control devices and my eyeglasses.

I miss his companionship. I had my place on the green couch in front of the television. His place was next to me. He would sprawl there and sleep like some kingly beast upon his padded divan as long as I would remain next to him. And that was his place. Anyone who dared take it while he was temporarily away would be met with a wretched stare and bark once Catfish wanted it back.

And they would move. I doubt he actually would have bitten them if they hadn't, but they didn't know that, and, come to think about it, I'm not absolutely certain he wouldn't have, either.

Evidence of him remains around the house. I found a chewed up golf ball on the floor the other day. That was his doing.

Catfish grew out of the destructive stage at 3, but he would still maim something like an occasional golf ball if he happened to find it on the floor.

His bag of food is still in the cupboard. I've just never gotten around to throwing it out.

There's still a framed photograph of me holding him when he was a puppy in the den hallway. When he was alive I rarely noticed it. Now, it seems to catch my eye each time I walk past it.

I miss him at night. I've got one of those elaborate alarm systems, but I'd felt even safer knowing that nothing would approach my house without meeting with Catfish's bark, which was astoundingly deep and loud.

And I miss that bark when I come home. It never mattered what time I came home or where I had been. As soon as he would hear the car door slam in the driveway, he would start and he would keep it up until I opened the door. And then, there he would stand, tail awag, to greet me. My self- esteem always soared.

I walk into an empty, silent house these days. I feel the difference in the deepest recesses of wherever it is my love resides.

Two months. No whining and pawing on the door to go outside. No thrilled bellow at the words, "Catfish, wanna go for a ride!" No smell. Dogs smell. It was a good smell.

Two months. Sixty days. It should have ended by now.

I said, it should have.
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His humor was also unique. He made a list of things that computers will never be able to do as well as humans.

1. Make fried chicken like my momma can, crispy on the outside and moist on the inside and use the leftover grease to make cream gravy for the biscuits and taters.

2. Sing "Angel flying too close to the ground" like Willie Nelson can.

Thats funny.

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Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 16759

"Daddy Was A Pistol, And I'm A Son of a Gun" is quite possibly the funniest piece of writing of the 20th century, while at the same time a wrenching story of a flawed man who could not control his addictions. Magnificent.

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