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willimo
Erythrophiliac

Registered: Jan 2003
Location: mediocre apartment
Posts: 2614
I must have sold my soul to the devil.

Because I have a big dick. This may seem like bragging, but it's not. It sucks, actually, because the girl I want to have sex with repeatedly and exclusively can't take it. This is why I think I sold my soul. "Here's your big dick, fella, good luck using it."

Fuck you, devil.

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Hey carrot juice, I want to squeeze you away until you bleed.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 06:14 PM
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SimpleSimon
?

Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 15982

Big is a relative term. Dimensions?

Also, if she can't rake your dick, no matter what size it may be, she needs to think about the implications of getting pregnant very carefully.

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"...the last thing somebody crippled wants is your pity—and maybe not even your sympathy—he just wants to be normal again, just like everybody else. Every gesture of caring becomes a slap in the face, a reminder that you are not well. So damn your sympathy, damn your caring, how dare you stand over me, perfect and healthy, and offer your help and your secret condescension.

" - John Varley, Steel Beach

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Old Post 11-16-2006 06:18 PM
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r1burden
R1~of societies Burdens

Registered: Oct 2006
Location:
Posts: 67

maybe it is just an excuse so she doenst have to put up with you, if you tap it enough it will losen up , and remember whay my grandaddy always told me,,,,good pussy makes it own juice...

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You can be a king or a street sweeper, but everybody dances with the Grim Reaper.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 06:23 PM
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Rokkr
cwaestor

Registered: Apr 2004
Location: Insatiation
Posts: 8980

You're a bit naive or your dick is awfully huge, as babies are delivered every day through the same type of orifice you can't fit your dick in.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 06:25 PM
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Hawley Griffin
fear on internets

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: south afrika
Posts: 16485

getting punched in the cervix is awesome fun!

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how pitiful ordinary human feelings are in the face of implacable injustice

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Old Post 11-16-2006 06:44 PM
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Trenchant_Troll
ad hominid

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 24302

What Willimo is conveniently leaving out is the fact that the girl he is referring to is six.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 06:45 PM
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bacidath
me - a killer

Registered: Jul 2000
Location:
Posts: 3519

maybe you're not doing it right...

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deaththreat

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Old Post 11-16-2006 06:45 PM
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Hawley Griffin
fear on internets

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: south afrika
Posts: 16485

quote:
Originally posted by bacidath
maybe you're not doing it right...


STICK IT IN HER POOPER

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Old Post 11-16-2006 06:46 PM
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Pinecrika
Prophet of Doom

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Disgusting den of creepitude
Posts: 9694

Go to an adult store and buy several dildos from small to large and work that box till loose and sloppy.

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Easy to pull off!

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Old Post 11-16-2006 08:17 PM
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Hawley Griffin
fear on internets

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: south afrika
Posts: 16485

willimo should post a picture of his cock

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Old Post 11-16-2006 08:19 PM
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Lightbulb
Blarg. I'm dead.

Registered: Jan 2001
Location:
Posts: 1163

And his six year old.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 09:08 PM
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SimpleSimon
?

Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 15982

quote:
Originally posted by Lightbulb
And his six year old.

Posting pictures of your nieces without parental consent isn't cool.

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"...the last thing somebody crippled wants is your pity—and maybe not even your sympathy—he just wants to be normal again, just like everybody else. Every gesture of caring becomes a slap in the face, a reminder that you are not well. So damn your sympathy, damn your caring, how dare you stand over me, perfect and healthy, and offer your help and your secret condescension.

" - John Varley, Steel Beach

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Old Post 11-16-2006 09:49 PM
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fubar
ignoramus extravagantus

Registered: Apr 2005
Location: wool puller
Posts: 10256

Maybe the rohyphenols make her PC muscle contract.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 09:56 PM
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Paint CHiPs
Viva Le Me

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26383

Hey, this is about the willmo, not the PC, muscle.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:15 PM
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willimo
Erythrophiliac

Registered: Jan 2003
Location: mediocre apartment
Posts: 2614

You gave my girl a muscle! You jerk! Now we fight.

And it's not that she can't, it's just uncomfortable. Otherwise, we do ok.

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Hey carrot juice, I want to squeeze you away until you bleed.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:33 PM
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Dacarlo
Militant Wankgnome

Registered: Oct 2000
Location:
Posts: 9147

Do ya go down on her first?

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:34 PM
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willimo
Erythrophiliac

Registered: Jan 2003
Location: mediocre apartment
Posts: 2614

Always.

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Hey carrot juice, I want to squeeze you away until you bleed.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:35 PM
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Paint CHiPs
Viva Le Me

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26383

quote:
Originally posted by willimo

And it's not that she can't, it's just uncomfortable.


Then who gives a shit?

Sheesh, next you'll be asking about the imaginary female orgasm.

Tell her to bite her lip or something and shut the fuck up or her rectum gets it next.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:37 PM
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Paint CHiPs
Viva Le Me

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26383

"Uncomfortable". For fuck's sake. What is this, some kind of WOMYN convention?

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:38 PM
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Hawley Griffin
fear on internets

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: south afrika
Posts: 16485

so ... who was in office the last time you got laid?

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how pitiful ordinary human feelings are in the face of implacable injustice

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:44 PM
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Paint CHiPs
Viva Le Me

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26383

The Republicans.

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:51 PM
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Hawley Griffin
fear on internets

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: south afrika
Posts: 16485

bush

heh heh heh ... ive got nothing

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:53 PM
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Paint CHiPs
Viva Le Me

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26383

I just got out of a relationship a couple of weeks ago, so I went from lots of sex to none real fast, which might account for the sudden violent misogyny.

I need to get laid this weekend, I think. With somebody that properly appreciates me and my shortcomings.

Hey willmo, speaking of your girlfriend......

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:56 PM
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Hawley Griffin
fear on internets

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: south afrika
Posts: 16485

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how pitiful ordinary human feelings are in the face of implacable injustice

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Old Post 11-16-2006 10:58 PM
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Cherry Yidaki
snuggly fucking bunny

Registered: Sep 2006
Location: St Maries, ID
Posts: 6674
Re: I must have sold my soul to the devil.

quote:
Originally posted by willimo
I have a big dick.


Spit it out - it's probably mine.

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Old Post 11-17-2006 03:44 AM
Cherry Yidaki is offline