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Pinecrika
Prophet of Doom

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Disgusting den of creepitude
Posts: 10541

Useless skills

As the father of an almost four year old daughter I've recently acquired a new useless skill (well not to her but..)

I can dress a Barbie doll. They didn't tell me about that in parenting class.

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11-18-2006 06:31 AM

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ignatz mouse
Mistress of Tranquility

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Hey at least that was one class you went to.

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11-18-2006 07:36 AM

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Pinecrika
Prophet of Doom

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Hey! I went to the classes (I have a completion diploma, too!) I just took them less than serious.

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11-18-2006 08:30 AM

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ignatz mouse
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Parenting classes, drunken asshole classes -- you should have an exciting array of diplomas by now.

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11-18-2006 08:44 AM

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Pinecrika
Prophet of Doom

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quote:
Originally posted by ignatz mouse
drunken asshole classes --

Awww, you read me like a book, sweet pea.

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11-18-2006 09:02 AM

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Trenchant_Troll
ad hominid

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
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Something tells me that you didn't so much acquire that skill but simply partook in your secret hobby in reverse.

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11-18-2006 04:17 PM

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Cherry Yidaki
snuggly fucking bunny

Registered: Sep 2006
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When you can recite the entire "Hop on Pop" and "One Fish, Two Fish" sagas from memory you will be ready for the next level, grasshoppah.

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11-18-2006 04:49 PM

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Oracular_Jinx
Contents under pressure

Registered: Oct 2001
Location: Lat: 43� 42' 0 N, Long: 79� 34' 0 W
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Hmmm I suppose that's something to talk about.

I can make my eyeballs wiggle and flip my tongue.

My mom's friend once knew someone who could independently wiggle each toe. Now THAT is impressive.

A kid in high school had less nerve endings than normal kids, so he used to pop a safety pin through his cheeks, do it up and pretend to be a fish. Maybe that's too useful though - he could have joined a side show.

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SocialParasite
100% pure failtanium.

Registered: Jul 2000
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I can recite the script of Holy Grail and have you ROTFLOL.

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11-18-2006 06:24 PM

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Mordecai
destractivegodofdarkness

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: library
Posts: 19584

I juggle.

It's pretty useless but it sure mesmerizes the dog when I've got three tennis balls going every which way in front of his face. He snaps at them and misses a lot. One of these days I'm gonna lose a hand.

-m

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SimpleSimon
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I can wiggle my ears. One at a time, or both together. I can also wiggle my nose, in two different ways. Used to combine that with wiggling my ears, all in time to the beat of whatever music was playing.

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11-18-2006 07:11 PM

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ignatz mouse
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I can wiggle my eyes and ears (and do evil things with my lips and tongue).

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11-18-2006 07:14 PM

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SimpleSimon
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Registered: Dec 2002
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quote:
Originally posted by ignatz mouse
I can wiggle my eyes and ears (and do evil things with my lips and tongue).

Of course you can. You ARE female.

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11-18-2006 07:16 PM

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Cherry Yidaki
snuggly fucking bunny

Registered: Sep 2006
Location: St Maries, ID
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I can't think of a single skill that's totally useless. Including dressing Barbies.

I can knap a decent arrowhead out of obsidian, flint or chert - which you would probably consider a useless skill - until you needed it.

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11-18-2006 07:28 PM

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billgerat
All hail the hypnotoad!

Registered: Aug 2000
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quote:
Originally posted by ignatz mouse
I can wiggle my eyes and ears (and do evil things with my lips and tongue).

Doing evil things with the lips and tongue are the greatest skills that a woman can have.

If you ever need to practice those skills, Ignatz, I'll be there to help you.

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11-18-2006 07:53 PM

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barbie_c73
hyper contradiction

Registered: Oct 2004
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Re: Useless skills

quote:
Originally posted by Pinecrika
I can dress a Barbie doll.

Hey! Me too...!!!

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11-18-2006 07:57 PM

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Pinecrika
Prophet of Doom

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quote:
Originally posted by Cherry Yidaki

I can knap a decent arrowhead out of obsidian, flint or chert - which you would probably consider a useless skill - until you needed it.

I don't think that useless, in fact, that's a neat skill. I've seen some dude do that at the rendezvous at the old mission. He made it look easy, I tried and made myself look like an asshole.

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SimpleSimon
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Re: Re: Useless skills

quote:
Originally posted by barbie_c73
Hey! Me too...!!!

I heard you were better (and quicker) at undressing one.

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barbie_c73
hyper contradiction

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Re: Re: Re: Useless skills

quote:
Originally posted by SimpleSimon
I heard you were better (and quicker) at undressing one.

Have you been talking to mike???

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11-18-2006 08:06 PM

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Large Filipino
Fuck me hard in my arse.

Registered: Feb 2004
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I can hold 164 pennies on my elbow then catch it with my hand that's connected to said elbow.

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11-18-2006 08:26 PM

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barbie_c73
hyper contradiction

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No way! Show us LF

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11-18-2006 08:54 PM

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Mordecai
destractivegodofdarkness

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: library
Posts: 19584

quote:
Originally posted by Pinecrika
I don't think that useless, in fact, that's a neat skill. I've seen some dude do that at the rendezvous at the old mission. He made it look easy, I tried and made myself look like an asshole.

I've tried it a few times, made all of two successful arrowheads out of obsidian. Those fuckers are sharp to the point of being evil.

-m

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11-18-2006 08:59 PM

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Cherry Yidaki
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quote:
Originally posted by Pinecrika
I don't think that useless, in fact, that's a neat skill. I've seen some dude do that at the rendezvous at the old mission. He made it look easy, I tried and made myself look like an asshole.

If you managed to escape looking like a bloody asshole, you were doing good! When I was learning I cut my hands up so much... my jeans were stiff with dried gore from where I kept wiping the cuts so I could see to try it again. I found pressure flaking with the tip of a deer antler to be the most effective method for me.

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11-18-2006 09:06 PM

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Coincidence
Aka 'others'

Registered: Apr 2004
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Oh where to start? I can move my little fingers independently of my other fingers.

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Cherry Yidaki
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You could be a high-priced gynocologist, then.

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