Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Dumbfucksville!
Posts: 12164

Why did the chicken..........

Why did the chicken cross the road?

KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

PLATO: For the greater good.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

KARL MARX: It was an historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

ARTHUR ANDERSEN CONSULTANT: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the
competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and
implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and
technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable
them to synergize with an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the
chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution.
Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken,"Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the
road, and there was much rejoicing.

MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?

RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive
there was.

JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing
walking around all over the place, anyway?

FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to
cross roads.

EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road... it transcended it.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?

GoFuckYourselves!: TO GET TO THE ASYLUM OF COURSE!

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Illinois
Posts: 1217

BILL CLINTON: I did not have sexual relations with that chicken.

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I went Grunge and all I got was this lousy stench.

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Dumbfucksville!
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quote:

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Originally posted by Leroy Binks:
BILL CLINTON: I did not have sexual relations with that chicken.

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location:
Posts: 7973

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Ed Grimely: To get Pat sajak's autograph I must say!

Hulk Hogun: To get away from my acting.

Britney Speres: She got lost in the game, she's sorry but oops!

G W. Bush: You see here? The chickens are leaveing america. But with my trillion dollar tax cut bringing the economy back onto it's feet they'll make their way back. And then I'LL SHOOTEM!! KILLIM ALL!

Elvis Presely: One for the money! Two for the show! Three to get ready, now go cat go! Let's walk! Everybody lets walk! Everybody on the whole dang block, Let's go rockin' on a street cross walk!

Jim Morrison: Oh.. wait a sec. He's dead.

David Lynch: Burning EYELIDS!! YEAHRHGG!

Arnold Swartzenegger: It's doesn't matter, she'll be back.

Molson Ad exec: Because the rooster was having an Ex.

This girl:

Dah. What's a chicken?

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No turkish prison can hold me. But you may for a price.

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Dumbfucksville!
Posts: 12164

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because they're eating people at hotmail.com.

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Registered: Aug 2000
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They are?? I knew it!!

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No turkish prison can hold me. But you may for a price.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: sydney
Posts: 2202

dr helmut kohl: you cant proof that i filled that chicken with money before i told him to cross the street to lichtenstein.
gerhard schröder: was i ever married to that chicken ? if yes it may have tryed to kill itself after i left it.
andrea fischer: it had mad chicken disease , thats why

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Dumbfucksville!
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quote:

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Originally posted by iglo:
dr helmut kohl: you cant proof that i filled that chicken with money before i told him to cross the street to lichtenstein.
gerhard schröder: was i ever married to that chicken ? if yes it may have tryed to kill itself after i left it.
andrea fischer: it had mad chicken disease , thats why

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: sydney
Posts: 2202

forgive me this too mr .fuckyourself


dr. mengele: because chickens are an inferior race

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