Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Erehwon
Posts: 7543

Sex Advice

Sometimes, when a girl is about to have sex with a guy, she gets a little nervous about asking him to wear a condom to stop her getting pregnant.

Girls, when this happens, just flip over and tell him to fuck you in the ass, as you can't get pregnant that way

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a /\/\ i n a l

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Southwestern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1600

Ha, I wouldn't be nervous about asking a guy to stick a rubber on his hoohoo dilly. It's better than me carrying a lil bun in the oven... not at this time in my life please!!
as for the ass... *covers bumbum* NOOOOOO! *moves hand a little on her bum cheek to show her tattoo* WRONG WAY! DO NOT ENTER!!!!!
In other words, WRONG HOLE DEMMIT!!!!!!

quote:

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Originally posted by aminal:
Sometimes, when a girl is about to have sex with a guy, she gets a little nervous about asking him to wear a condom to stop her getting pregnant.

Girls, when this happens, just flip over and tell him to fuck you in the ass, as you can't get pregnant that way

---

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Erehwon
Posts: 7543

While playing with your girlfriends punani, she will enjoy seeing how much of your hand you can get up there. Girls like boys with big hands.

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a /\/\ i n a l

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Bangor, ME
Posts: 10218

HAHAHAHAHHAH!!!!

this rocks!


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"Most people use statistics the way a drunkard uses a lamp post, more for support than illumination."
---Mark Twain

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Canton, Illinois
Posts: 923

I'm not nervous about that stuff...but then again I'm not what you would call "normal"

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Kick ass, whitey!
hehe, dicklips.
Snot rockets!

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 2566

thanks aminal, ill keep that in mind



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its like getting the prize out of the cereal box


[This message has been edited by illu§§ion (edited 03-05-2001).]

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Erehwon
Posts: 7543

If you are one of those wierdos who like being with a girl when she is on her period, you can re-inact this for the rest of the month by dry humping her butt. This will cause enough blood for comfortable lubrication and she will like this.

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a /\/\ i n a l

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Canton, Illinois
Posts: 923

quote:

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Originally posted by aminal:
While playing with your girlfriends punani, she will enjoy seeing how much of your hand you can get up there. Girls like boys with big hands.

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Southwestern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1600

my housemate (the psycho one) told me once (when we were friends) that her friend from back home (Ottawa) wanted to remain a virgin, so she would only have anal sex with her bf (LOL!!!). One night when his parents were away, he was giving it to her in the poop tunnel on the staircase, when suddenly the door rattled a bit and in came his parents. Naked, fucking his girlfriend up the ass, and in shock, the boy pulled out rapidly.. causing the girls body to go into shock and she proceeded to SHEEEEEAAAAAT all over the place.
MMMMM can we say corn?

quote:

---

Originally posted by aminal:
Sometimes, when a girl is about to have sex with a guy, she gets a little nervous about asking him to wear a condom to stop her getting pregnant.

Girls, when this happens, just flip over and tell him to fuck you in the ass, as you can't get pregnant that way

---

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Erehwon
Posts: 7543

girls when giving head, remember how much he likes you to nibble on the sensitive head of his cock. biting and teeth are an essential part of the mouth so should be part of every fellatio session.

also if you feel you are about to gag - just gaga a little - the acidic feeling will feel great on his cock

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a /\/\ i n a l

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Registered: Sep 2000
Location: Playa d'en London
Posts: 9840

aminal is god



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never argue with an idiot, they bring you down to their level
and then beat you with experience.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Erehwon
Posts: 7543

if your girlfriend is interested in fun with food, fill her cunt up with your favourite beer and enjoy your drink with an extra frothy head.

the bubbles will work wonders

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a /\/\ i n a l

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Erehwon
Posts: 7543

you can move on to spirits, but only if she is a real goer!

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a /\/\ i n a l

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: Cambridge
Posts: 7113

hmm.. and who told *her* that?
her friend?
i dont think so.
hehe

quote:

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Originally posted by * Datura *:
my housemate (the psycho one) told me once (when we were friends) that her friend from back home (Ottawa) wanted to remain a virgin, so she would only have anal sex with her bf (LOL!!!). One night when his parents were away, he was giving it to her in the poop tunnel on the staircase, when suddenly the door rattled a bit and in came his parents. Naked, fucking his girlfriend up the ass, and in shock, the boy pulled out rapidly.. causing the girls body to go into shock and she proceeded to SHEEEEEAAAAAT all over the place.
MMMMM can we say corn?

---

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Southwestern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1600

I've met her friends from back home. They are all brainless little hoochies.. I'm sure they told her.. unless.. it was her.

quote:

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Originally posted by Caffeine:
hmm.. and who told *her* that?
her friend?
i dont think so.
hehe

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Erehwon
Posts: 7543

all whores love to suck cock and all girls are whores

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a /\/\ i n a l

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: Cambridge
Posts: 7113

hehe
i think the psycho's friend was herself
teehee

quote:

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Originally posted by * Datura *:
I've met her friends from back home. They are all brainless little hoochies.. I'm sure they told her.. unless.. it was her.

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Registered: Sep 2000
Location: Elysian Fields, TX, USA
Posts: 2618

Top

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You have the potential to be a loser. GO FOR IT!

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Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Southwestern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1600

maybe!
my housemate (one the the sweeties) and i were talking about this down in the kitchen after dinner, and she made a good point.. it could have easily been a lie. She could be making shit up about us too.. my housemate said 'she could tell someone that when my bf stays over we have crazy anal sex and once when we were doing it, i tore my rectum - then everytime they see me on campus they will know me as rectum girl even though in reality im repulsed by it'.
she is an evil girl. i wouldnt be surprised.

quote:

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Originally posted by Caffeine:
hehe
i think the psycho's friend was herself
teehee

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: Cambridge
Posts: 7113

it does sound like something she would do.
ugh... she has some serious problems!

quote:

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Originally posted by * Datura *:
maybe!
my housemate (one the the sweeties) and i were talking about this down in the kitchen after dinner, and she made a good point.. it could have easily been a lie. She could be making shit up about us too.. my housemate said 'she could tell someone that when my bf stays over we have crazy anal sex and once when we were doing it, i tore my rectum - then everytime they see me on campus they will know me as rectum girl even though in reality im repulsed by it'.
she is an evil girl. i wouldnt be surprised.

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26516

quote:

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Originally posted by aminal:
all whores love to suck cock and all girls are whores

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Registered: Sep 2000
Location: Elysian Fields, TX, USA
Posts: 2618

Shit.

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You have the potential to be a loser. GO FOR IT!

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Registered: Jul 2000
Location: NH
Posts: 6086

This is the best thread ever.

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Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Boston
Posts: 7364

animal, more! more!

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"You have just destroyed one model XQJ-37 nuclear powered pansexual
roto-plooker....and you're gonna have to pay for it."
-Frank Zappa

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Registered: Aug 2000
Location: GA
Posts: 6969

quote:

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Originally posted by aminal:
If you are one of those wierdos who like being with a girl when she is on her period, you can re-inact this for the rest of the month by dry humping her butt. This will cause enough blood for comfortable lubrication and she will like this.

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hahahaha
this one rules.





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"Men are all alike--except the one you've met who's different."-Mae West

"Brains are an asset to the woman in love who's smart enough to hide 'em."- also Mae West

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