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Dreamengineer
Master of Dumbfuckery

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: here stupid!
Posts: 1907

Unhappy Shit........

Shit may just be the most powerful word in the English language.

You can be shit faced,
shit out of luck,
or have shit for brains.

With a little effort, you can get your shit together,
find a place for your shit or
decide to shit or get off the pot.

You can smoke shit,
buy shit,
sell shit,
lose shit,
find shit,
forget shit,
and tell others to eat shit and die.

Some people know their shit while others
can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.

There are lucky shits,
dumb shits,
crazy shits,
and sweet shits.

There is bull shit,
horse shit and
chicken shit.

You can throw shit,
sling shit,
catch shit,
or duck when shit hits the fan.

You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep shit or
be happier than a pig in shit.

Some days are colder than shit,
some days are hotter than shit,
and some days are just plain shitty.

Some music sounds like shit,
things can look like shit,
and there are times when you feel like shit.

You can have too much shit,
not enough shit,
the right shit,
the wrong shit or
a lot of weird shit.

You can carry shit,
have a mountain of shit,
or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.

Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and
other times you swim in a lake of shit and
come out smelling like a rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts,
it's the basic building block of creation.
And remember, once you know your shit, you
don't need to know anything else!

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Old Post 04-20-2001 05:41 PM
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RogueWarrior
Cuddly Puppy

Registered: Nov 2000
Location: Gehenna
Posts: 1018

Post

Ummmm. Yeah. FECES!

*me slings shit at dreamengineer*

Yep. Shit is a projectile too.

------------------------
What you would kill to see brings out the GOD in me.

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Old Post 04-20-2001 05:43 PM
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wonderaz
Sarky Bastard

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Sedona, Arizona
Posts: 19663

Post

But can you tell shit from Shinola?

------------------------
Don't argue with me.

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Old Post 04-20-2001 05:49 PM
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Princess_Chelle
no thank you

Registered: Aug 2000
Location: GA
Posts: 6969

Post

lets not forget holy shit or explosive shit
or shit on a stick, or not giving a shit.

------------------------

"Brains are an asset to the woman in love who's smart enough to hide 'em."- Mae West

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Old Post 04-20-2001 05:57 PM
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thatGuy
Guest

Registered: Not Yet
Location:
Posts: N/A

Post

that made me smile......thank you, I don't even know you and you saved my life in more ways than you could know.

------------------------
This may hurt a bit

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Old Post 04-20-2001 07:15 PM
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Avondale
two maidens, one chalice

Registered: Sep 2000
Location: atlanta
Posts: 6642

Post

That's some funny shit, let me tell you.

------------------------
my right wing is flapping, the left one is gray

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Old Post 04-20-2001 07:37 PM
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nymbus
incognito

Registered: Aug 2000
Location:
Posts: 3030

Post

Don't forget full of shit.

------------------------
Smile, tomorrow will be worse.

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Old Post 04-20-2001 07:38 PM
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Generic Failure
Fluffy Bunny

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: New Jersey. USA
Posts: 670

Wink

quote:
Originally posted by thatGuy:
that made me smile......thank you, I don't even know you and you saved my life in more ways than you could know.




Shit head.


------------------------
Not only am I a sexually deviant, misogynistic, immoral, wealthy, male prostitute, but I also sit on the board of directors of the organization that governs others of my kind.

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Old Post 04-20-2001 08:20 PM
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Roshigoth
The Cheesemeister

Registered: Aug 2000
Location: Myrtle Beach, SC
Posts: 15181

Post

I didn't see the obvious one... what about taking a shit?

------------------------
Fun for the feeble-minded!
Graphic Cheeseworks.

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Old Post 04-21-2001 12:18 AM
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JoeyCat
Felis Dominatus

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Delaware
Posts: 5729

Post

... or the everpopular, shit for brains.

------------------------
=^..^=

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Old Post 04-21-2001 12:20 AM
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Paint CHiPs
Viva Le Me

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26538

Post

Did any of you actually read the damn thing?

Shit for brains
Shit and shineola
sling shit
not giving a shit
getting shitfaced

All were included.

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Old Post 04-21-2001 12:34 AM
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Mordecai
destractivegodofdarkness

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: Denver
Posts: 20610

Post

I sure as shit didn't read your shitty post because I knew it'd be nothing but bunch of shit i'd seen before, yet another shitty Carlin rip-off. I shit on this thread.

-m


------------------------
Freedom means taking the bad with the good.

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Old Post 04-21-2001 12:36 AM
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Bondo
Vagrant Benthos

Registered: Nov 2000
Location: Houston
Posts: 545

Post

Y'all can wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one fills up first.

------------------------
I am a product of my environment and the torch bearer of a white trash legacy. Give me strength.

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Old Post 04-21-2001 12:43 AM
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Dead_Inside
Joey's Head Bitch

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: NH
Posts: 6086

Post

quote:
Originally posted by Mordecai:
I sure as shit didn't read your shitty post because I knew it'd be nothing but bunch of shit i'd seen before, yet another shitty Carlin rip-off. I shit on this thread.


I bet Dream will be so scared when he reads that he will be shitting bricks.

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Old Post 04-21-2001 12:46 AM
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wonderaz
Sarky Bastard

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Sedona, Arizona
Posts: 19663

Post

Or getting shitfaced

I had to edit this as it had been mentioned by DE in his first sentence which I didn't notice right off. So don't give me any shit.


------------------------
Don't argue with me.

[This message has been edited by wonderaz (edited 04-20-2001).]

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Old Post 04-21-2001 06:00 AM
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Princess_Chelle
no thank you

Registered: Aug 2000
Location: GA
Posts: 6969

Post

i knew youd try and pull some shit like that.

------------------------

"Brains are an asset to the woman in love who's smart enough to hide 'em."- Mae West

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Old Post 04-21-2001 06:03 AM
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wonderaz
Sarky Bastard

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Sedona, Arizona
Posts: 19663

Post

So? I don't give a shit if you knew that.

------------------------
Don't argue with me.

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Old Post 04-21-2001 06:09 AM
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bunkum
Sanditon

Registered: Jul 2000
Location:
Posts: 4501

Post

You're all acting like little shits.

------------------------
Deny closure. Honor ambiguity.

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Old Post 04-21-2001 06:12 AM
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Princess_Chelle
no thank you

Registered: Aug 2000
Location: GA
Posts: 6969

Post

hehe

this is fun


holy shit fire!

------------------------

"Brains are an asset to the woman in love who's smart enough to hide 'em."- Mae West

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Old Post 04-21-2001 06:14 AM
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Dacarlo
Militant Wankgnome

Registered: Oct 2000
Location:
Posts: 9670

Post

quote:
Originally posted by Princess_Chelle:
hehe

this is fun
holy shit fire!




Holy batshit fatman!

Shit must be the 5th element

------------------------

"The real measure of your wealth is how much you'd be worth if
> you lost all your money."


[This message has been edited by Dacarlo (edited 04-20-2001).]

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Old Post 04-21-2001 06:29 AM
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Dreamengineer
Master of Dumbfuckery

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: here stupid!
Posts: 1907

Post

quote:
Originally posted by Dead_Inside:
I bet Dream will be so scared when he reads that he will be shitting bricks.




Shits large bricks on Dead_Inside
Plop Plop!!

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Old Post 04-21-2001 03:58 PM
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