Registered: Jul 2000
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Proof that the Intelligence Services are fucking stupid sometimes

MI5 considered using a team of highly-trained gerbils to detect spies and terrorists flying into Britain during the 1970s, Sir Stephen Lander, the service's director-general, revealed yesterday.

The plan was based on the ability of gerbils to detect a rise in adrenalin from changes in the scent of human sweat. Sir Stephen said the Israelis had put the idea into practice, placing gerbil cages to the side of security checks for travellers at Tel Aviv airport. A suitably placed fan wafted the scent of the suspect's sweat into the cage.

The gerbils were trained by Pavlovian response to press a lever if they detected increased adrenalin, receiving food as a reward. The system was never put into practice by MI5 because the Israelis were forced to abandon it after they found that the gerbil could not tell the difference between terrorists and passengers who were scared of flying.
Speaking at a conference at the Public Record Office in Kew, Sir Stephen said MI5 archives contained a complete volume on the idea - which was based on Canadian research for the Royal Canadian Mounted Police - written in the 1970s.
Although Dame Stella Rimington made a practice of speaking publicly in an attempt to change MI5's secretive reputation, yesterday's Missing Dimension conference was only the second occasion that Sir Stephen has done so.

The conference marks a new PRO exhibition on espionage, Shaken Not Stirred, starting today, which includes exhibits on a number of spies including Mata Hari and a spy paid the equivalent of £6.5 million by King George I to spy on the Stuarts.

The Missing Dimension refers to the fact that most histories are written before intelligence files have been released and so omit a crucial element of what occurred and why. Sir Stephen admitted that it would be a long time before MI5 would be able to release details of its Cold War activities.

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'My names Gerbil. Gerbilly Gerbil. License to Kill'

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sp00ky

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Registered: Jan 2001
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RSPCA needs to know about this. No animal should have to endure human sweat.

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true ADHD. Oh yes, the Lions are going to win today

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sp00ky

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quote:

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Originally posted by Spooky:
Oh yes, the Lions are going to win today

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I won't let them.

Australia will win. I put all the gerbils in the world on it.



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quote:

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Originally posted by A.D.H.D:
Australia will win. I put all the gerbils in the world on it.

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lol...won;t happen. This our time

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sp00ky

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Is it too late to withdraw my bet?

Because as it is, the gerbils would be better off with the Mi5.




We are playing like shite.

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quote:

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Originally posted by A.D.H.D:
Is it too late to withdraw my bet?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Spooky:

quote:

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Originally posted by A.D.H.D:
Is it too late to withdraw my bet?

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yes it is

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Bottom.

Australia played like shit.
Britain's defence was too good.

Shite.

I'm off to burn flags in the street. Later.



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quote:

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Originally posted by A.D.H.D:
I'm off to burn flags in the street. Later.

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hahahaha British Lions 29 Australia 13



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sp00ky

I want lie shipwrecked and comatosed, drinking fresk mango juic. Goldfish shoals nibbling at my toes. Fun fun fun, in the sum sun sun.

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hmmm the british lions always kick arse! no matter who they play.....

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It's interesting to think of all the things intelligence services may have successfully done.

What's even more interesting is to consider all the cockamamy ideas they cooked up that ended up getting abandoned.

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