Let's look at the prevailing theory. There are a lot of variations, of course, but here are the essentials:
You have a soul which is immaterial but somehow hangs out inside your body, except maybe when you're asleep or drunk. This soul is the source of your consciousness, and without it you would have the personality of a slug. What the brain is for is anyone's guess. It may have been put there by God just to throw everyone off the track.
Once your body has been subjected to enough abuse, the soul abandons it and you die. At this point, the soul might go to Heaven or Hell, or just hang out here on earth waiting for a guest spot on Unsolved Mysteries.
Anyway, assuming you steer clear of Hell, the afterlife is supposed to be a pretty good deal. You're free of all suffering and want, and there is nothing to fear. Since you don't have a body anymore, sex is pretty-much out of the question; but hey, you can't have everything, right?
If people really believed this stuff, you'd suppose they would welcome the chance to escape their pathetic lives as quickly as possible. Yet, they fight tooth and nail to hang onto life, even when it is nothing but interminable agony. Maybe their belief in life after death isn't that solid after all. Or maybe that no-body-no-sex thing is bothering them more than we thought.
Well that's the theory. Do you buy it? You do? Then we have a bridge in Brooklyn you might be interested in buying as well. And after you buy it, you can climb up on the rail and make a full-gainer right into that wonderful afterlife that's waiting for you. Don't forget to write.
There is no life after death. There is no reward or punishment after death. There is nothing after death. Death is the complete annihilation of self. When I die, I will cease to be in every sense. Nothing I do now can change this ultimate fate.
quote:Originally posted by MrSherman: For god sakes wonderaz, give me some kind of credit.
Why should he, when you refuse to do the same for the real author? The word of the day is attribution (and tomorrow's word is infringement, followed by attorney). Maybe this page will help you.
The author of these bleak essays deserves no credit. They are poorly written if humor was the intent.
If I was the author, I would pretend someone else wrote them.
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Hope for the Helplessly Happy, Lesson 4
10-22-2000 05:50 PM
