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dying
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One hundred years from now probably nobody will know or care what kind of car I drove or what clothes I wore or where I lived or how much money I had. But if I can make a positive difference in the lives of others, my physical existence in this lifetime may have effects that I could never predict. It's no matter that nobody would likely remember my name in that case.
There's no telling how long I will be remembered. It's of little import, because eventually EVERYBODY will pass out of the collective consciousness - even people like Caesar and Einstein and perhaps even the Christ and the Buddha. At that point the guy who painted on cave walls tens of thousands of years ago has the only real claim on some sort of anonymous immortality.
What's in a remembered name anyway? Does the fact that anyone may remember the words Frank Turrentine and speak my name somehow resurrect my consciousness and give me new life? I'll be gone. As my father says when we talk about his funeral plans: I don't care what you do with me, so long as you make damn sure I'm dead. I won't care at that point.
I fear dying, because I fear pain and the unknown. I don't particularly fear death, however, because, well, there's not much I can do about it; and it's something we ALL have to experience at some point. None of us are truly alone in that regard. I do believe in a Ground of Being that informs all life, but I don't think it matters which fairy tale narrative I subscribe to to explain existence and that Mystery that transcends human understanding. Those myths really only serve to reconcile me to those things while I am still breathing in and out.
I don't have to spend much time worrying about this kind of thing, however. Why would I waste any time on that? And I certainly don't see my life as so meaningless that I need to define it by my death. It's a common saying in my crowd, but it's true: What other people think of me is none of my business. It's relatively unimportant whether anyone remembers me or not. That is not what makes me who I am, and the opinions of others now or in the future isn't going to make my life right now any more enjoyable or worthwhile. If I want self-esteem, I should do estimable things right now for their own sake and not for a pat on the head from people I don't know who haven't even been born yet.
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