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SPew
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Reva, 22, of Beatrice, died at Parkview Center on Sunday afternoon, August 24, 2008. Funeral services are pending with the Fox Funeral Home of Plymouth.
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I just found out my favorite client from when I worked at BSDC is dying. She caught pneumonia and is now being placed on comfort care.
I loved you more than I had ever thought possible. You were the only reason why I kept going to work when things got bad. You taught me how to care. You taught me to never give up. You taught me to appreciate even the most simple things. You taught me how to be a human again.
As long as I live I will never forget the day I came to visit you in the hospital after you caught pneumonia that one time. I'll never forget the smile that came on your face as I came through the door and said hello. That was and still is the single best day of my life. If I ever forget that moment I hope I die.
I only wish I could be there for you this time.
...
I wasn't going to post this shit here, but what the fuck. Somebody needs a good lol at my expense this month.
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Kind of forgot this thing was here. You haven't really missed much. In the spirit of the New Year I'm hesitantly posting my 2007 Year That Was here.
If I had to sum the year up in one word it would be "asstastic."
I lost a job, faced the possiblity of prison time, haven't had a stable job all this year, and have burned through all of my resources trying to stay afloat.
January: I was suspended from my job in the first part of December of 06 on an abuse allegation. Just so we are clear I did screw up in a pretty fantastic way and took full responsibility for that mistake. I spent a good chunk of December talking to various people and govt agencies as part of the investigation. This also included a criminal investigation that had me looking down the barrel of a potential 5 - 15 year (somewhere around there) prison sentence and a felony conviction on my record. Thankfully the law is a lot more concrete and it was found that I had not broken the law (I can only assume this because the case was passed on to the county attorney and I'm still not in jail nor have I been arrested or charged with anything), but the policy put in place by the HHS and BSDC are a lot more vague. On January 24th I was fired from BSDC since they substantiated their claim via their all-encompassing policy. I understand why they fired me. They were under intense scrutiny after a failed audit and the Feds said we weren't firing enough people even over minor "abuse" stuff (pretty much the exact words the Feds used). I wasn't even all that mad that they fired me. What I am mad about is that the incident put me on the APS abuser database and has blacklisted me from any future work in a field I greatly enjoyed. Three and a half years of direct care experience and three years of experience as a medication aide were rendered absolutely useless, and my plan to get a nursing license was promptly flushed down the toilet. I tried to have my termination appealed, but my union's lawyer refused to do so since he didn't feel we could win because I did the right thing and admitted fault. The worst part of all was that I nearly took down my unit manager and a high ranking management member with me. The unit manager got away with a slap on the wrist and the higher ranking management member was shuffled into a different position.
February: Turned 24 and started working at Casey's. The job wasn't all that great, but it paid ridiculously well for a gas station job.
March - May: Still working at Casey's. Stuff. I think I started playing Magic again somewhere in here. Or maybe that was in 06. Fuck if I can remember.
June: I quit my job at Casey's after I had a disagreement with management. I worked someone's morning shift plus my own evening shift, and then had to come back at 11:00 PM for a mandatory "cleaning party." We didn't get out of there until about 2:50 AM and I was supposed to be back for a morning shift. I told my manager that there was no way in hell I was going to come back to work on about four and a half hours of sleep and she said I had better be in or I'm fired. When I woke up for work the room wouldn't quit spinning and I couldn't string together a coherent thought to save my life so I called to let them know I wasn't coming. The assistant manager that was there that morning said she'd call around to see if anyone would be able to cover and wound up calling the store manager for whatever reason. The assistant manager called me back and told me to be there or be fired so I told her that if that's the game they're going to play then my only option is to quit. If there is one thing I will not compromise on it is my health and safety. No job is worth it. I had worked something around 17 hours total on the day of the cleaning party and had gotten pretty much no sleep. I was in no condition to drive let alone work in a kitchen. I also will not be bullied around by my employer just because I should be greatful to have a job. I don't know if that makes me a good employee or a bad employee in the eyes of an employer.
July or August: Started working at Kentucky FAIL Chicken. Pay is okay for a fast food job, but the hours are terrible. I've been promised that the hours will get better once the kids go back to school.
September: Hours are still crap. In fact I'm getting fewer hours even though the kids are back in school. Depressed pretty much 24/7 which leads to some extremely angry outbursts at work when I feel overwhelmed that have at least half of my supervisors pissed off at me all the time. Fuck 'em. One of them decides to start fucking with me after telling me that I'm going to have to close kitchen, wash the cooler, and wash the floors by myself (and still get off on time so we aren't over hours) since they needed someone to do dishes and took my second kitchen dude away from me the minute he came in. I refused to play her game (she decided that I needed to repeat every chicken order back to her verbatim) so she wrote me up for insubordination. She asked me what my major malfunction was and I told her that I hated the place and was out of there. I kind of felt bad for quitting in the middle of a shift, but only the same way you'd feel a tick climbing up the back of your neck. The only real regret was that the supervisor that wrote me up was under the impression the entire time I worked there that I hated her. That wasn't the case at all. I enjoyed working with her, but I'm not a big talker (her entire basis that I hated her was that I didn't talk to her all that much).
October: Fuck Halloween.
November: I worked as a telemarketer for about a week but it didn't work out. If you can't make the numbers you're gone and I wasn't making numbers. The place paid $9/hr which was pretty freaking good.
December: Still no job. Managed to barely float through because my mom gave me cash for Christmas. Job prospects are terrible.
So that's the story of my 2007.
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There was talk of isolated tornadoes today in southeast Nebraska. Most of the data I had seen today said "Isolated? More like none." I was right, but just for the hell of it I sent a text to my friend Tom to see if he wanted to chase. He didn't have anything going on, so the game was afoot. After a stop at his house so he could show me an image program he's writing to help us with photo management we took off for the Wilber/Claytonia area and would decide what to do from there.
While we were driving through Saline county we noticed this guy pulled off on a gravel road with the typical chaser gear on the back of his truck. Being that we weren't in any hurry we decided to talk to the guy. He was spotting for Saline county but lives in Iowa. What that was about, I'll never know. The guy asked us if we were chasing storms today and I said yes. He then launched into a lecture about how I need to be safe and not drive into storms. I was cordial about it with him, but it was kind of annoying. I've learned my lesson about driving into storms to the tune of a $600 repair bill. I told the guy that I know what I'm doing (which is mostly true) and that I was planning on staying away from the core of any storm. In fact, my plan was to sit miles away and view structure. No desire to get under the bases of these storms since it was likely a crapola day.
So we're walking back to my car when this white car pulls up behind me and this lady steps out. She asks us if we're out chasing tornadoes and I thought she was a fellow chaser. I get all coy and say "Oh us? Why, we'd never do such a thing." Turns out she was just some local yokel wondering what the fuss was all about with two vehicles pulled over on the side of the road. Now some lady probably has a poor impression of storm chasers and thinks I'm a glib asshole. Which I am, but I'm trying to HELP the image of chasers to the general public.
So while we were talking to Spotter Guy we noticed a nice lowering the storm Tom and I were trying to catch up with was devloping near the rain shaft. He calls it in to his net, but by then it was beginning to dissipate, which was a bummer. The storm started to develop another lowering closer to the flanking line. We said we were going to take off and said our goodbye. As an afterthought Tom asked what frequency the spotter net was broadcasting on so we could listen in with his scanner. Spotter Guy then launched into a lecture about how we can't broadcast without a license. No. Fucking. Duh. We assured him that we can't broadcast with out little handheld scanner and parted ways.
We drove a ways north and turned west on the road with the Saline Center and parked on top of a little hill. We were fairly close to the storm but far enough away that we weren't going to get rain, hail, or struck by an unlikely tornado. We were in a good position so that as the storms continued to back build we could sit and watch for a while before we would have to move. From our position we could look pretty much straight up and see the updrafts of the storms when they weren't being obscured by stratus. The storms had signs of weak rotation (some striation of the base and an obvious rounded look). It produced a decent (not great by any measure) wall cloud for a while. I spent too much time looking at the lowering, so by the time I decided to take a picture it was dying. So this is a picture of a dying wall cloud. You can kinda make out a little RFD knotch just to the right of it.
Click me!
After watching the storm for a few minutes I figured I should get a shot of the updraft.
Click me!
I messed with camera settings beforehand, which I probably shouldn't have done. Everything came out much darker than it was. I played with the brightness on the updraft pic:
Click me!
We then drove north a ways, decided it was going linear in a hurry, and drove home.
So I wouldn't call it a bust. The storms did try to do their thing, but the environment was just too hostile. I'll call it a draw.
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I have a soft spot in my heart for the junk words that are used to bust current e-mail filtering techniques. I also feel that it is greatly unappreciated as a form of literature by the world at large. So tonight, I bring to you the epic known as:
RE: Loan Request: Veronica's Any Nightlife Divulgacin Cientfica: Dave Meyers Kanye the Discontent Word Critic
As written by Guy LeDouche.
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Jon, the guy that I've made a couple of posts about, died this morning. They found him dead in his bed around 0130. Cause of death is unknown as far as I've been told.
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http://www.journalstar.com/articles...99644009477.txt
Now some group that claims they're all about protected the retarded wants us shut down.
I'm going to reach a point where I'm going to snap and start hurting these idiots.
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This article really pissed me off:
http://www.ketv.com/news/9994263/detail.html
So I decided to send a message to the Associated Press. It's probably the dumbest, most futile thing I've ever done, but I had to do it. As I see more articles in papers I will make it a point to send a letter to the editor.
quote:
I am an employee of the Beatrice State Developmental Center, and I feel that I must speak out against what I feel is an irresponsible article written by the Associated Press. I do so at risk to my own future employment, but I feel it is necessary.
We did not pass the Federal inspection. That much of the article is the whole truth. The rest of the article is true, but it is guilty of omission of information that makes things seem worse than they are. I would like to think that the information was not brushed aside in the name of sensationalism. I really would, but the fact is that it seems that the information was omitted to cause the article to feel more "newsworthy" to the reader. While I can't go into any detail about any specifics, I would like to at least address the issues.
"an 18-year-old woman reported being raped by another client at the Beatrice State Developmental Center."
That is only partially true. It is policy that all sexual encounters between clients are to be classified as rape or sexual assault. So even if both parties consent to having sex with each other, it is still classified as a rape. This policy is largely based on the idea that these people are incapable of making decisions of their own, even if they are of a normal or near-normal functioning level.
"And one client suffered a black eye after being improperly restrained."
I take issue with that statement because it is not made clear if the client was improperly restrained, or if the client was restrained properly but protocol was not followed to the letter. Injuries will happen when people are put in restraint. It is a simple fact of the nature of the beast. If someone is being placed in restraints it isn't because they said a naughty word. Restraints are used because either the client is being physically aggressive towards someone, or they are engaged in self-injurious behavior. There are steps that staff must go through in order to place someone in restraints and it is only to be used as a last resort. Sometimes, if the behavior is dangerous enough, it is the only step. While people are being put in restraints they are not doing so willingly. Bumps and bruises are bound to happen and I feel that the Federal surveyors made a mountain out of a mole hill.
The whole article in general reads as though the staff are beating the residents, allowing people to be raped at will, and generally just don't care. Nothing could be farther from the truth. The residents are receiving the highest level of care that the direct support staff are capable of providing them. I really wish the media would actually come and talk to the staff before printing the garbage I've seen printed in various newspapers over the last few days. Or at least state things in a proper context so that the reader is allowed to form an accurate opinion of the state of affairs at BSDC.
We have to make a lot of changes. Most of these changes are going to be made at the administrative level, but that isn't to say that the direct support staff don't need to make changes as well. But things are not as bad as the press has made it sound, and we really wish the media would handle this issue with a little more respect and caution. You are going to ruin our lives if you don't.
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It's amazing how a connected series of events, and what you think is an innocuous gesture, can somehow bring your world crashing down around you. This is the story of my fall.
I had won an eBay auction of some Magic cards from the local supplier. This is also where I (used to) game. So I go to the shop to pick up my recently won cards. My evening is free (big shocker there) so I ask Chris what's going on tonight. He says that Jeff is coming down to run a Vampire game. I ask if it's cool to sit in and he says Jeff shouldn't have a problem with it. So I'm sitting there waiting for people to show up and then it's myself, Chris, Jeff, and Kindra.
Kindra is the sister of a friend I had been thinking about asking out. We had been hanging out a bit again and I was becoming attracted to her. I had decided a few weeks prior that I was going to deviate from my normal course of being attracted and doing nothing about it. By around the end of the session (I had to leave around 9:30 because I had work the next morning) I had finally worked up what little courage I have and decided to ask her. Because we were still gaming at the time I didn't want to be rude by asking her to step aside for a minute, so we exchanged messages on a piece of paper.
This is pretty much the entire conversation:
Me: Hey, you got anything going on Friday or Saturday?
Her: No.
Me: Want to see a movie?
Her: Sure.
Me: Friday or Saturday?
Her: Friday.
Me: Lincoln or Beatrice?
Her: Beatrice. What's playing?
Me: I don't know, but I can check. Call me on my cell tomorrow around 4:00.
Her: Okay.
I then left and went to bed. For once in my pathetic life I actually felt good about myself. I had a date for Friday (my first in nearly four or five years). I didn't care if our relationship went nowhere farther than where we already were. I had just made an attempt at defeating one of my demons, and my first step was a success. For those that don't know: I have an intense fear of relationships and rejection. It's a product of the abusive relationship my parents had and my total lack of self-confidence.
So the next day I come home from work and dink around the house until about 5:00. I decide to head down to the shop and see what's going on. I figured Jeff would probably be down to do another Vampire session, so I was stoked on that. Kindra hadn't called me, but I didn't think anything of it. She could have forgotten, or maybe she was busy. Whatever. Jeff was already there when I got there. To pass the time a bit I picked up a copy of the D&D 3.5 DM Guide and started reading from it. After a bit I got bored and put the book back up on the shelf I had gotten it from. It's not exactly the most exciting book to ever be printed.
Jeff then gets up from the table and asks me to go outside with him. I'm ask if this is a good walk or a bad walk. He says that depends. I figure he's either going to counsel me on how I played my character last night (when I play Vampire I play a Malkavian, and I tend to get a bit annoying), or I was about to get in trouble for asking Kindra out (that little voice in my head that reminds me how worthless I am sent me that one). We walk around the building to the alley and he says to me:
I don't know how else to say this: you need to back off and give Kindra some space.
That little voice in my head did a little triumphant dance at this point.
I asked him what he meant by that, at which point he reminded me about the situation going on with a couple of other guys (they both want her and are being creepy about it). He says something about Kindra being very fragile right now. And then he accuses me of stalking her.
He. Fucking. Accused. Me. Of. Stalking. Her.
He said that the only reason I was down at the shop the day before was because I knew she was coming, and that the only reason I was there today was because I knew she was coming. I tried to explain to him that I was down there yesterday because I was picking up some cards I won on eBay (the ones I reminded him were sitting on the table in front of me in plain view the whole time we were gaming), and that I was down there today because I didn't want to sit alone in my apartment all afternoon and wanted to game if there was gaming to be done. He brushed all that aside and then told me that I needed to knock it off or I was going to be just as bad as those guys.
I then flat out asked him if Kindra had said anything to him about being uncomfortable around me. He said no. I asked if she said anything that night to indicate that my asking her to a movie was an unwanted advance. Again he said no.
At this point we go back inside. Kindra then comes to the store. I tried to hang out for some gaming, but I was so angry at Jeff that I had to leave. I tried to cover my sudden retreat by purchasing the copy of the DM guide I had been reading and muttering something about having things to do at home.
Yep. Lame.
I then did something that I now deeply regret:
I sent an e-mail to Chris informing him that I wasn't going to be coming to the shop for an undetermined amount of time and gave the reason why. In hindsight it wasn't the brightest idea, but at the time to say that I wasn't thinking straight would be like saying the sun is warm.
I have now e-mailed Chris twice trying to at least get some information as to what happened between Tuesday night and Wednesday afternoon, but he appears to be ignoring my e-mails.
And so in less than 24 hours I have managed to alienate myself. I have reduced myself to less than nothing. And now I'm telling the internet all about it.
Hawley would be quite right to quip about my failure at life.
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One of my co-workers has been arrested for murder. We were wondering where she had been Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Now we know.
http://beatricedailysun.com/article.../news/news1.txt
quote:
A 42-year-old Fairbury woman has been arrested in the murder of her 49-year-old ex-boyfriend, according to a news release issued Monday morning by Jefferson County Attorney Linda Bauer and Jefferson County Sheriff Nels Sorensen.
David Koenig was found dead on the premises of his rural Daykin home with gunshot wounds to the chest, and Laurie Malousek told law enforcement officials she killed him and hid the body early Friday morning, according to Bauer and Sorensen.
Koenig was reported missing sometime this weekend.
No further details were available at press time.
That makes two employees from the hospital building that have been arrested for murder.
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