[Story Index] [Discussion Thread] [The Asylum]
one of those days
By RiZZ
2001-04-29
I still do not understand what happened to me that evening and I’m not the type of person to take experiences and strange forces as a "sign" or feel the need for an explanation (it would be nice this time). I just prefer to ride and see what happens next. Now how can I put the feelings into words? I most likely can’t but here is my attempt anyway.
That Friday morning I woke up and thought to myself “I wonder what magical things will come my way.” Which is about how I start most my days. Little did I know it would be a fight, and not even against anyone, just me versus the unknown.
I walked into the living room and Jimmy said, “hey come here, let me show you some stuff I picked up.” So I followed him into the back room, not knowing it would be a battle on the way back. We went into the back room and he pulled out this brown bag and inside it was a really nice survival knife with all the neat toys: a German knife with a shawistika on the handle, and a knife from the KKK complete with the “Honorary member” card. These things aren’t the strange part though. Jimmy and I were talking about where he picked them up and Micah came into the back room and was looking at the knifes. All of the sudden I felt really (dizzy) and just needed to sit down.
“I need to sit down,” I spoke under my breath and as I did I was turning to walk out the door of the back room. I made it one step and I lost nearly all my sight and the dizziness got worse; it felt like I was on a boat being tossed in the angry sea. “I’m gonna fall down” I thought to myself. I forced my body to take another step, I couldn’t see, couldn’t feel anything except numbness creeping through my body in giant waves. I knew for sure I was gonna fall down but I took the last step to the doorway of the back room and that’s as far as I made it.
I think I hit the left side of the doorway and bounced off the other and then onto my ass. I didn’t feel it, I just kind of felt myself shrink to the floor. I sat there, head spinning, and it just kept getting worse. I still couldn’t see or hear well. I was trapped inside my own head with only me (who didn’t know what was going on or how to explain it). All I could think is “this isn’t right, what the fuck is happening?”. I ‘think’ I was thinking clearly, it was only my body that went nuts.
“Get in the bathroom nick” I thought was the best idea. “Cold shower will fix this”. But how to get there? I think I crawled the 4 steps into the bathroom but I can’t be sure. When I got in the bathroom “I need to sit down” I thought and I didn’t know what my body would do next so the bathroom was the best place. I took off my clothes, I believe, and I sat on the toilet to “gain control”.
I was sweating, bad. I remember wiping my forehead with my hand and being covered in sweat. I sat there thinking, “what could be happing to me?”. Then my sight faded back in. I had to close my eyes; I couldn’t handle to movement of just looking around. After that I do not know how long I sat there spinning and just dwelling in the "wrong" feeling that swarmed in me.
“I’m gonna die here naked on the toilet taking a shit, what has life come to? Well at least I didn’t defecate myself in the hallway, wipe your ass before you die you moron” I thought to myself (which is just about how I think). I forced myself to reach the whole foot and a half that it took to reach the shower knobs and I just spun them at random.
I sat there listing to the water and just letting my body have its reaction or whatever it was. After a few more moments I said “fuck it, let's see how this goes” and I kind of rolled into the shower and just laid there in the tub with the water running in my face. My body seemed to shut down and my mind sort of locked up. I didn’t think, I didn’t move, I was just a body in the tub. My mind started to lose hold of the bit of reality that I had left. I feel I am a strong-minded person and if you really know me you’d probably agree.
I lost it all, grasping for reality and searching the back of my eyelids. I watched the water hit my eyes making bright colors and all I heard was the metallic clinks of water hitting the porcelain, burning into my mind. I twisted and turned (maybe my body did too or maybe it was just the mind) just wanting the "wrong" to stop.
After hours of spinning colors and feelings, I came back to realty. I slowly stood up. Well I sat up first to see if I held my ground then got to my knees. I didn’t want to stand up to fast and start this craziness over. Slowly but surely I made it to my feet ,I turned off the water and got out. I still felt strange and not sure what happened but I got dressed and I noticed in the mirror I was white as a ghost. I walked out of the bathroom and all I could say is “man that was fucked up”. Now it is a day later and I’ve slept and I still don’t feel quite right. Oh and the kicker is no one saw any of it and I was gone for only about 7 minutes from “I need to sit down” to coming out of the bathroom.